


Henri

by chickennuggetmoney



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-18
Updated: 2021-03-01
Packaged: 2021-03-14 08:20:37
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 23,928
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29539512
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chickennuggetmoney/pseuds/chickennuggetmoney
Summary: follow up to my Shuri fic - Red Dawn/Iris is credited to well_well_well (her pics are very good please read) and Henri Belova is my own character, sibling of Yelena Belova - mentions bracelets - again you have to read the previous pic to understand. part one of who knows how many...
Relationships: Maria Hill/Natasha Romanov, Michelle Jones/Shuri, Yelena Belova & Carol Danvers
Kudos: 1





	1. Chapter 1

‘Hey Clint!’ I bellowed over all the heads crowding the doors. He fought his way through the mass of people converging on Em and Shuri to get back to me. 

‘yeah’ he panted, extricating his leg from the rabble and stumbling over 

‘just wondering can you teach me archery? I mean it’s kinda cool...’ his face lit up like a child at christmas (clearly nobody had asked him before) 

‘yeah sure! I mean I was actually thinking about teaching Nathaniel now he’s...well old enough to hold stuff so if that’s ok with you we can do it at the same time?’ 

‘sure’ I nodded, then forced my way through the crowd with infinitely more elegance than Clint and threw myself on Em. 

‘i missed you idiot – how was it?!’ I shrieked and she laughed, lugging their bags out of the car and throwing a few at me with her force. I caught them deftly, then caught Peter in a bubble of glow as he was thrown backwards by the force of the one tossed at him, and helped them inside. 

‘it was amazing’ laughed Em, dumping her bags down. 

‘good to be back though’ she squeezed Shuri’s hand and they both grinned as Carol floated down the stairs with Aly and grinned happily at the sight of them. 

‘right, I'm off to the lab, God knows what those damn interns have done while I was away and I had an idea while we were on the plane’ Shuri groaned, wheeling away and calling FRIDAY down to take her up to the labs. 

Clint headed off home and the others followed me up to the kitchen (I had been giving them cooking lessons as half of them couldn’t even scramble eggs). 

Half an hour later I was explaining how to boil an egg as Val took down furious notes, when Carol returned with Aly and cleared their throat 

‘I can now announce that the who-does-Aly-love-best competition will commence in t-10 minutes.’ We explained to Em that we had scheduled a competition to see which one of her aunties and uncles Aly loved the most after furious arguments, she laughed uproariously at our ridiculous competitiveness and immediately joined in. 

* 

‘First up, our very own.... Brunhilde valkyrrriiiieeeee’ said Carol in their very best commentator voice, speaking into a microphone they had sourced from somewhere. 

Val made a face at Carol at the use of her most hated name and took the baby from Nat. 

She sat her down and transformed into a puppy, bouncing around and licking Aly as she giggled, then into a kitten where she punced on her tail and fell over into a heap of fluff, finally she morphed into a monkey, blowing raspberries and jumping around Aly, who grabbed her with her tiny little hands and threw her across the room where she turned back into a human and started screaming profanities, clutching her shoulder. When we had popped Val’s dislocated shoulder back into place, been punched in retaliation and put her in a sling, it was everyone elses turn. Red was disqualified for trying to psychically influence Aly to make her win, Tony hadn’t joined in, and Bruce and Thor pulled out when Aly booed their double act of peekaboo. Lena didn’t have a go, stating that she didn’t need a competition to know that she was Aly’s favourite auntie, and once she had released us from various strangle-holds after we said she was a chicken, it was Carol’s turn. Carol picked up Aly and shot out of the window, diving and backflipping in the blue sky outside, they looked smug as they returned, Aly squealing in delight and smacking her chubby little fists together in an attempt at clapping. Em took the floor, levitating Aly’s favourite toys and bouncing them out of her reahc, this did not have the intended effect and Aly started crying when she couldn’t reach her baby hippo. Em retreated embarrassedly and Peter swept the baby off the floor, nearly dropping her but re-catching her just in time, and scampering across the ceiling with her, shooting webs as she tried to grab them. Shuri built her a robot which was a great success, and finally it was my turn. 

I closed my eyes, summoned my glow (we really had to come up with a better name for it) and surrounded Aly in a bubble, bouncing her around as she squealed, snatching at the violet glow. I eventually brought her down and Red dropped into her mind to work out who she liked best. As she was working it out, Aly fell forwards from her sitting position onto her hands and knees and crawled unsteadily towards me. I shrieked and pointed, everyone turned their heads and clapped rather disgruntledly as Aly collapsed next to me and I lifted her into my lap 

‘Wel it appears that the winner is...our very own Henri Belooooovvaaaa’ shouted Carol, laughing. I cheered, then took Aly back upstairs to change her. 

* 

‘Hey henri?’ 

We were in nightmare club, just me and Val and Nat tonight, and I was stress baking and twisting my ring around my finger until it rubbed away the flesh on my finger and opened up my old cuts again, adding to the scars of previous bad nights. The oven tinged and I pulled out yet another batch of muffins to add to the already cooked ones lining every surface. I pulled a bowl out of the cupboard with shaking hands and started mixing frosting mechanically. Suddenly Val looked up from where she was sitting. 

‘Hey henri’ I looked around 

‘How come you never wear a sports top in the gym, you always just wear big t shirts’ 

I paused for a second, wondering if I should tell them, but before I could stop it the story came tumbling out; 

I hesitated, then lifted up my shirt, exposing the scar. It ran in a jagged line from the bottom of my rib to my hip, like a river wending its way across a desert land. 

‘i wasn’t ready for questions about this’ I said quietly, dropping my shirt down to cover it again. Rayna had been on my thoughts the last few days, I guess because it was her birthday today, or tomorrow, I didn’t know what time of night it was. I sat in silence for a minute, ordering thoughts in my head, but they didn’t ask, they waited until I spoke. 

‘My best friend...Rayna....well, only friend. She was the only one who accepted me, she made me the bracelets, so she could know without asking. Before I came here, a few months before, she died. We were out in town, it was...a good day, one of the only good days because we weren’t at school, or the orphanage. We had been to see a film, the current war, and we were walking home when...’ my voice stopped, memories swimming around my head, blood and pain and tears...the look on her face and then...that hollow feeling. I stood up and walked over to the worktop, frosting muffins so that my back was turned, and they couldn’t see the tears. 

‘these boys from my school, caught us in the alley, it was a shortcut and she had been scared of going down there but I didn’t listen. I didn’t listen’ I whispered the last words, the pain brought with them flooding my body and making my very bones ache, my pulse beat along my scar. 

‘they caught us and started bullying her, she wore a hijab and...had...a birthmark on her face, it turned the whole left side of her face purple. I told her it was beautiful, like.....the mark of God. and she started to be...less self-conscious about it, I think she even started to love it. But they had always bullied her about it, that or her religion, they didn’t care what as long as they had something to tear her apart over, calling her tomato face or terrorist and other unimaginative insults, so I got sick of it, I lost it and I punched the guy...pretty hard. But he pulled a knife and slashed me’ I paused, my hand on my belly, feeling the familiar ridges of the scar, and continued. 

‘She had gone to the ambulance cadets and her dead dad had been a doctor, she saved my life that day, packed the wound, stopped me bleeding out. but they told her to get away, not to help me, and she refused. She helped me in every conceivable way possible until they dragged her away. The kicked and screamed and fought to get back to me but they stabbed her too. then bolted. I was barely conscious but I managed to get over to her.’ her face was imprinted in my mind, the image of her heaving chest, the flowing blood, the evil knife. I swallowed and continued, my resolve hardened, I owed her this. 

‘As soon as my vision cleared a bit, I saw her, she was lying on the ground, writhing, she was in so much pain I didn’t know what to do so I just went over and put her head in my lap and held her hand, she just managed to stay awake. but I knew she wasn’t going to make it so..i told her I....’ I paused again, tears falling in earnest. 

‘i told her I was in love with her. that I always had been. That I always would be. And she smiled, she looked so peaceful, then she told me she was too. she said after all this time and we both...’ I only thought of one thing to say’ but at this my legs gave way and I collapsed into a heap on the floor, the spoon in my hand drawing zig zags like a heart rate monitor on the floor as I shook with sobs. Rayna. I missed her, and her funny smile, and her fierce nature, the way she had helped me search for the red room, for Lena, and not questioned it once. I missed her so much I felt my heart had been ripped out of me and thrown in a mincer, to the point where I wished it had been me, dying on that dingy alley floor, covered in my own blood and my friend’s tears. 

Val and Nat came and sat either side of me, holding my hands and trying to stop me crying but there was nothing they could do, they were helpless, like I had been. As I sat there the compound faded away and I was back, looking into her glassy eyes, unable to bring myself to touch her wrist, to see if life still beat through her. my phone was dead, so was hers, there was nobody near and an ambulance would take too long. I was pulled back to the present by Val’s voice. 

‘What did you say Henri?’ 

I blinked, a few more years spilling down my cheeks and whispered. 

‘always.’ 

I heard footsteps and looked up, Peter had walked in, no doubt looking for food of some sort, saw me and hurried over to me. He asked what was wrong, but I couldn’t say it again. I continued from where I had left off, each word tearing at me, but I owed her this. 

‘she loved harry potter. she always had. I think she knew she was dying; she gave me this’ I held up my ring, exposing my raw finger from where I had twisted it, it was a fire opal set in gold. ‘I never knew where she had got it but she wore it every day, it reminded her to be strong she said, fiery. I told her to hang on, I didn’t want her to die I couldn’t live without her, but she pulled me down and kissed me, some of her last words were a quote. That was Rayna, she loved quotes, she said it was because other people were so good at putting her feelings into words. She said I know you’ll live, because you need to live for the both of us, so take this, and it’ll remind you to be fierce. It’ll remind you that I wanted you to live, and you know you always do what I tell you Henri Belova’ I laughed weakly at this, my voice stuck in my throat, but I forced the words out. ‘she said...she wasn’t scared, after all, to the well-organised mind, death is but the next great adventure’. She smiled, and her chest...stopped moving. I couldn’t bring myself to check her pulse, but I knew there wouldn’t be one. So..i closed her eyes, I took the knife out of her. I Wrapped her in my coat, and I sat there with her, someone found us the next day and called an ambulance. But it was way too late by then. The orphanage’s budget just stretched to a gravestone. I go there sometimes, sit and talk to her, bring her flowers to plant there, cornflowers were her favourites, and yellow roses. I...i miss her.’ I choked ‘and today’s.... today’s her birthday, her sixteenth. We always said on her sixteenth we could run away, go travelling, she wanted to see Amsterdam, and Tahiti, she had posters all over her walls of the places we’d go.’ 

I couldn’t say any more. Val’s face was covered in silent tears, the moonlight reflecting tracks down her face, Nat quietly explained to Peter as I stood up and started frosting more cupcakes. I used my glow to send the others upstairs when they fell asleep. They had said they weren’t leaving me, but I needed to be alone. Carol came down early and found me, tear stained, and sleep deprived amongst a sea of cake. They didn’t ask, just cleared a chair and sat down next to me. Val came down next, Peter Nat, Maria and Red following her, and stood me up. Nat was holding small plastic plant pots with yellow roses, and Peter a bag of cornflower bulbs. Val was holding her phone, maps app open, and Maria and Red helped me up from the table, carrying trowels and watering cans. Carol followed as they led me outside, and we climbed into a car. I knew where we were going and I stared out of the window all the way. 

When we arrived, it was a beautiful morning, clear and sunny. I walked straight to the pale grey headstone. The orphanage had let me choose it as I had been her only friend. It was simple, said her name, then underneath, always, I promise. 

They followed me silently, and I crouched down next to it. The shins of my trousers were wet, but I didn’t care. I weeded and pulled up the wilting flowers, planting the new ones. When I was finished, I sat there, leaning against the stone, feeling the rough surface, warmed by the late May sunlight and feeling peaceful, Rayna had been able to find peace wherever she had gone, even in the end down that dark alley with a knife in her chest. It had been harder for me, but today I knew it wasn’t the weather, or the setting, it was having her near me again, that made me peaceful. 

* 

The others went to wait in the car and give me some space, Red holding Val’s hand as she remembered Astrid, her own person who had perished like Rayna had, before they got a chance to live out their lives together. 

I sat there for hours, whispering to her, feeling comfort. When the sky took a darker tinge, I checked my watch, I couldn’t stay any longer. I touched the tips of my fingers to the stone, then wended my way through the garden of bodies back to my waiting family. 

When I got home, I went straight up to my room. I went to collapse on my bed, exhausted, but saw something there. A grey sports top, and a post-it stuck to it in Val’s writing. 

For when you feel brave enough xx 

I bit my lip, then pulled some sweatpants from my drawer and put on the top. I traced my finger down my scar, touched my ring, and felt her strength in me. My exhaustion evaporated, I headed for the gym, when I got there, the others were all gathered too, Val gave me a thumbs up, and with the memory of Rayna beating through my head keeping my past alive, and the sight of Peter swinging around with his webs holding my future in his hands, I fought better than ever. 

* 

‘Hi! You ready to start?’ Clint called across the gym. I stepped away from the punchbag and unwrapped my hands, holding up a hand in ascent and taking a long glug of water. On his back were three bows and a quiver of arrows, and he was holding the hand of his seven year old son. Nat shrieked and ran over to Little Nat, sweeping him up and hugging him as he giggled and tried to fight her off, and everyone else hurried to greet them. 

‘So we’re just going to do basics and stuff today because Nat’s not done this before and neither have you,’ started Clint, but his son interrupted him 

‘What’s that big scar from?’ he asked, pointing at my abs, the white scar visible against my flesh. I beckoned him closer, cupped my hand and whispered in his ear 

‘do you want to know my secret? I'm really a pirate! I got my big scar from fighting the dastardly one-eyed.....Redbeard’ I invented, drawing on last night’s sherlock extravaganza. 

He gasped and smiled, drawing his fingers across his lips as a silent pact, then he beckoned me closer too 

‘do you want to know my secret’ he whispered. I raised an eyebrow at him, and nodded 

‘i’m really a girl’ he whispered in my ear 

‘i just look like a boy, but I'm really a girl like auntie Nat 

‘have you told daddy?’ I asked 

‘not yet’ whispered little nat 

‘do you want to tell him together?’ I asked, and Nat nodded enthusiastically. I took her hand and led her over to Clint, who was setting up targets. 

‘Clint...’ he looked up and turned around, face expectant 

‘Nat has something to tell you’ I grinned encouragingly at Nat and she looked up at Clint 

‘I’m not a boy daddy, I'm a girl, I'm a princess!’ she said, smiling, and Clint grinned at her, bending down to be at her level. 

‘you sure?’ 

‘absolutely 100% yes’ said Nat quickly, a big grin still over her face 

‘Then, I'm going to teach my beautiful big girl to shoot an arrow’ he said, laughing, and little Nat ran and hugged him tight 

‘Not such a traitor after all then’ came big Nat’s voice 

‘turns out you are a Tashie like me!’ 

‘I like that’ grinned little Nat, and Clint replied 

‘Well, that’s what we’ll call you then’ 

She looked so happy. 

Over the next hour, Clint taught me and Tashie the stance and how to hold the bow, and he said we both took to it well. I high fived Tashie and stayed on to practise while Clint took her home. 

* 

A couple of hours later at dinner, I called attention in between mouthfuls of soup and asked any of the girls in the tower if they had some old clothes or costumes, they could give to Tashie. Red and Val didn’t, but Em said she’d run to her dad’s and have a look, and Shuri flat out refused any contact with family after the wedding (to be honest I didn’t blame her) and soon enough Em returned with a bin bag full of old cardies and tops. 

We all sat on the sitting room floor watching Grey’s anatomy and sorting through the clothes and exclaiming over some of Em’s tiny old clothes and shoes, then parcelled them up to give to clint in the morning. 

That night I lay awake with mixed emotions, I was so happy for Tashie, her parents had been so much better with her than the orphanage or my school had been at accepting me, but the raked-up memories of Rayna still floated like gentle leaves in my head. I took the ribbon out of my drawer, feeling its softness slip through my fingers. Rayna had given it to me on my seventh birthday, it had been all she had been able to find, scrounged from the playground at school, but I had kept it, and worn it every birthday, regardless of my gender, until the one after she died, I hadn’t been able to face it. I quietly moved over to the mirror, and wrapped it under my hair, bringing it out on the top, but it didn’t fit anymore. I smiled sadly, but I knew what to do. I wrapped it in tissue paper and put it under my pillow to give to Tashie.


	2. chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> urrmmm can't actually remember what happens - mentions of a bomb and guns but not massively bad - stab mention and vomiting - kinda icky but not bad - hope you enjoy!

I heard my pager go off, eight others bleeping at the same time. Interrupting our rare and enjoyable day out in town. it was Tony. I read the message off the small screen. 

Vatican Cameos 

Battle stations 

A bomber 

A small map hologram popped up on each pager. 

‘Shall we ladies?’ Asked Carol 

‘hell yeah’ we all replied, relieved at some action after weeks of low crime rates and headed in the direction Tony’s map pointed us. I was about to run away when Peter pulled me back, he kissed me quickly and looked into my eyes 

‘Be careful ok’ 

‘no way in hell, but I'll be quick I promise you that’ I laughed, pulling on my mask and running towards the impending mayhem. Finally 

I pulled my pen from my pocket, a Christmas present from Shuri, clicked the top and stood back as it shot out into a staff. The others were already fighting, twirling and punching as the now-exposed bombers waved guns, but I saw two of them point their guns at Peter’s back, as he fought off a third, I levitated him out of the way and turned to them. 

‘Now that’s not very polite boys’ I said, raising an eyebrow, and shot up into the air as they whipped their guns around to face me. 

‘You........should learn.......some decent........manners’ I grunted, spinning around and catching the first one’s wrist with my staff, flicking the gun out of his reach catching him under the arm with an ankle, flinging him up into the air and spinning the staff around to beat him in the stomach, the force of impact sending him flying so he hit the wall and crumpled, and throwing myself into a backflip, grabbing the last man with my feet. I jerked my legs so he was thrown into the air, gun spinning away in the June sunlight and caught him in glow, I wrapped tendrils around his arms and grabbed him in a headlock, punctuating every word I uttered with an uppercut to the jaw 

‘you...little...stupid...piece...of..crap...what...did...they...ever...do...to..you...you...deserve....to....rot...in...HELL’ at the last word I let out a huge blast, throwing him to the floor. I floated down, panting, and repressing the tingling in my fingers that meant burning. I tied them up, holding them above me balanced on a finger, surrounded by glow, I reached for my pager and typed a message to Carol 

My two have learnt their lesson – how goes it in the thick of it? 

Soon enough I got a brief reply 

All incapacitated, come quick. 

I knew something was wrong, so I ran. There was a group in the middle of the square, clustered round a figure, I saw Nat, Lena, Peter, Carol, Red, Val, the feet of the suit Shuri wore to walk. With a plummeting feeling I realised that the figure on the floor must be Em. I ran faster, casting my two unconscious bombers aside and pushed through the group. Ambulance medics were lifting her onto a stretcher, carrying her into the ambulance and slamming the doors 

‘what...what happened’ I gasped, hands on my knees panting. 

‘She was hit, in the hand, she lost a lot of blood so they’re taking her in to see what they can do but she’s stable she’ll be ok’ said Carol reassuringly, and I went and hugged Shuri. 

Em came home a week later, a hole in her hand (making for an epic battle scar), which was wrapped in layers of bandage, off her face on morphine and to a new invention from her ever-reliable wife that gave her IV antibiotics and painkillers so she could use her hand normally. 

I woke up that night in a cold sweat, Rayna. The past few days had raked up memories and I had been having the recurring nightmare. I kneaded my hands into my eyes, stood up and stretched, touching the ring on my dresser, and headed down to the gym. I surrounded myself in glow, an impenetrable fortress, then screamed, I closed my eyes and screamed. No sound escaped. When I floated back down a minute later I faltered. Nat was standing in the doorway, seeing. I saw pain on her face, most people wouldn’t see it but I knew what it looked like to hold it back. She looked at me, silently asking if I needed to talk, but I shook my head and grabbed some gloves. I needed to punch the pain away, so I did. I punched until my wrists were stiff and my feelings were numb. The Red room had taken away my ability to feel pain and then was the first moment I was grateful. I took the bow Clint had given me. I shot targets until morning, the steady thwack of bullseye after bullseye calming me, silent tears running down my face, uninhibited. 

I summoned the arrows back, loaded my bow, aimed, released. Summon, load, aim, release. Over and over. The rhythm was calming and soon I was relaxing into it, my breathing slowed. 

By the time I had exhausted my arrows and needed a drink, Nat had exited the gun range. She sat down next to me and drank in silence. Then looked at me. 

‘I....have experience of holding in the pain. You try to go about as normal but your demons are ripping you apart. Shooting helped, and boxing, letting it out on some inanimate sillouhette. But after a while it takes it out of you, every night when the demons come to get you, you get tired of beating them away. So you have to make a choice, do you keep going like this, let it push you to breaking point, burn yourself out, run right to the edge and lean over because you don’t know what else to do, or do you face them. Do you confront them head on and allow yourself to feel the pain, allow yourself to cry the tears you’ve earnt, so you can get past them and find the happiness you deserve. You cam’t be happy until you’ve faced them and every day of denial it becomes harder. But you aren’t alone, I can help you face them, Lena and Peter too, and Em, Shuri, Val, Red, Carol, we’ve all faced it and it makes us stronger, you have an army at your back to help you fight the war. You don’t need to fight it alone‘ 

I crumpled, I had been trying to be fine for so long, only sometimes letting myself be vulnerable, in exchange for brief moments of happiness. But it was no way to live, Nat was right, I had to let myself feel the pain. 

I felt it then, it washed over me, losing my parents, Rayna, the months in Red room, stuck full of needles, tied down under the bright lights, fire coursing through my veins, my traitorous heart pumping toxins around my body, bound to my blood, feeling like a monster. But as I felt the pain I saw how they had always been there, how they were always where I needed them to be so I could get through the pain. Rayna had been there when I lost my parents, when I lost her, I found a new family, when I thought I lost them, they were there, they never left me, they saw when I was in pain and they beat it away the best they could. 

Nat was right, I had earnt these tears, I had a right to cry them, but I had survived, I had got through all the mess, I had lived, and I would continue to, so it was so important that I did, I could live for Rayna, and I could live for myself, I was facing my demons and I was surviving them. And now I could think of my past without drowning. I could think of it almost fondly, the good moments, being rescued from the Red room, the moments with Rayna when she was alive. I could remember the good things among the bad. 

Nat sat next to me for hours, just being there while I worked through all of this, while I figured out the light in the dark. I stood up as the sun rose, dazzling us through the window, suddenly full of a new kind of energy, pumped to live, free of the exhaustion and depression that had held me in shackles. Suddenly, with no prompting there was something I had to do. 

‘thank you, so much, you...thanks’ I said to Nat and she grinned, then bounced upstairs to the faint sounds of her wailing baby. I pulled out my phone and scrolled through my contacts, I heard the ringtone, then the voice picked up 

‘hello?! Jesus what time is it?” and the sound of someone stumbling out of bed 

‘shut up, and come to the gym. now’ 

A minute later the doors opened, and Peter walked in. I ran, threw myself at him and hugged him. 

‘What Henri what the frick frack tickity tack what’ he asked confusedly as I let him go. 

‘Nat, she, well it’s hard to explain but somehow I feel different, lighter, I faced my demons - I faced them and won and now I'm ready to live, and I realised I haven’t been much fun the last few months – no I haven’t stop, and I just wanted to say sorry, and thanks for sticking by me, and getting rid of all that stuff cluttering my brain made me see more clearly, I realised something, it’s been there for a while, I should have got there months ago but I'm there now so’ I shrugged my shoulders 

‘i love you spidey, I love your stupid grin, and how good you are with Aly, and how loyal you were, you stuck by me when I was broken and gave me time to mend, I love everything about you and you are probably hella freaking out right now but I had to say it.’ 

‘Nah I'm noit freaking out but damnit I meant to get there first – stop always stepping on my moment nitwit’ 

He ducked as I threw a punch and grabbed me in a headlock, wrestling me to the floor where I lay laughing. Just laughing, until the others came down and asked why we were laughing on the floor. 

* 

‘ugh I'm getting rusty – anyone here fancy learning to fence so I can actually practise on a real person’ I groaned 

‘yeah sure’ called Val from where she was judging Hulk and Thor’s battle of brawn (yes that was the legitimate name) and called time out, walking over. 

‘i’ll see if I can get another sabre from somewhere but for now you’re just going to have to use.....um.....well you can learn with mine and we’ll see if we can find one tomorrow. 

She nodded, bouncing over, and I took her through the steps, lunges, different parries, fancy twiddly bits like bellestras, feints, beats and etiquette (there’s quite a lot of bowing and saluting that Red found amusing) and eventually she was a decent fencer. 

‘You learnt quicker than I thought - I'll see if I can source some proper stuff so we can have a match’ I panted, and jogged out of the doors. 

Tony managed to procure some electric kit and boxes from the gym down the road (of which he had helped set up on the promise we could use the equipment for free provided we returned it) and pretty soon we had managed to fix it up. Val looked uncomfortable in the sweltering layers but I settled into the sauna like I was coming home, I had missed this. I had fun feinting and beating her sword, managing to flick it out of her wrist at one point, and just generally winning against someone so high in the rankings of fighter, and when I drew off my mask later, wiping the sweat from my forehead with the back of my glove and doing the weird arm-twisting handshake you have to do when one of you is a leftie, I was happy. 

* 

‘So good luck to small glowing bean’ Nat said, bouncing Aly on her knee and speaking matter-of-factly, a sly grin creeping up her face. We were having dinner the night before I started a new school after half term, right now, I needed to go back for the end of the year to ‘introduce myself’ and get settled in to somewhere new before I went into GCSE year – aka the year of caffeine. I had left my old school after my three months out for training and the Red room kidnap, and had been doing home schooling, fitted in around my hours in the gym and the labs since, but Carol and Tony had agreed with my grudging consent that I had been out long enough and I needed to go back to a proper school before my GCSE year. 

I was starting at Red’s school on the logic that I would have a friendly face if I needed one but I was still batshit terrified, especially of the supposed homophobic teacher, but as I sat eating in silence, I realised that I must have faced worse. I could do this – how hard could it be. 

The terror came back in full measure the following morning, I got up at five, after a few fitful hours of sleep, dosed myself up on coffee and headed to the gym to work off some of my nerves. When I got back to our room to shower, I saw a pile of stuff on my bed; Peter had got up early and laid out clothes for me, knowing that stress made me indecisive. I smiled stupidly and pulled on the clothes; he had left me my khaki cargo pants, a white t-shirt, and my leather jacket, Rayna’s ring was on a thin gold chain and there was a note attatched to it 

I thought you could wear it like this from now – that way you won’t rub your finger raw but you’ll have her with you when you need the fire xx 

I clasped it round my neck and the cold weight on my collarbone soothed me, then I finished getting dressed, tying my red band around my wrist, and clattered downstairs. Everyone else was waiting in the kitchen. As I walked in Red threw a pile of brick-like textbooks into my arms 

‘these got me through GCSE’s and believe me that was the shittiest time of my life, so they are sure as hell going to get you through it – Nat's dropping us off, but I'll walk you in and find your classroom.’ 

I smiled nervously in thanks and the others piled on various other things, a pencil case, satchel, lunch (apparently the cafeteria food was pigswill) and a bottle of water. I ate breakfast hurriedly and the others waved us off as Nat ushered us into the car. 

‘so, you’re going to want to steer clear of Izzie Davids and stay silent in front of Miss Scott if you want all your limbs and to be detention-free, but otherwise it’s mostly all instinct you’ll pick it up...’ Red kept up a constant stream of advice and encouragement on the short drive, but her voice was white noise as I attempted to hold my breakfast down. Finally, we got round the corner from the school, and I fumbled with the catch on the car door, flinging it open and yarfing my guts out voluptuously into some poor person’s bin. 

Once I spat the last of the bile from my mouth, Nat passed me a packet of polos, nodded good luck and pulled away. I shook my hair out of my eyes, adjusted my jacket and re-applied my lipstick in Red’s sunglasses before slapping my face in preparation and walking straight into the belly of the beast. 

Immediately there were a stream of questions as I walked in, but most of them were deflected by Red 

‘удачи маленький светящийся фасоль’ she muttered, patting me on the back, pointing at a door and heading off to a waiting Al. (good luck small glowing bean) 

‘Lexie is anyone watching?’ I muttered – LEXIE, or LEX was the name I had given to the AI in my suits that Tony had given me, I had extracted the earpiece so I could have some company at school, and it turns out it came in handy when she gave me the all-clear so i could finish yarfing out of the window. I pushed open the door and walked into my class. The teacher at the front pointed me to a small desk and told everyone to get out their books and stuff. I reached down to pull out my pencil case and textbooks, not making eye contact with anyone, but listening intently to the whispers circulating the classroom 

‘Who’s the new kid’ 

‘Wait is it a girl or a boy?’ 

‘cool hair’ 

‘who the hell is that’ 

I evaluated in my head; nothing too bad – maybe I would get a fresh start here 

‘OMG’ shouted a boy behind me, standing up and pointing enthusiastically at me, I felt my cheeks flush 

‘OMG THAT’S BLACK WOLF – THEY'RE WHITE WIDOW’S....umm sister or brother – you're like nonbinary or something right?’ 

He leaned forwards speaking more quietly. I laughed a bit and twisted round in my seat 

‘yeah, that’s me – my actual name’s Henri and yeah - I'm genderfluid actually – girl today though so you can call me her sister’ he relaxed, grinning euphorically at meeting a ‘superhero’ and soon there were chants of 

‘show us the powers!’ 

‘yeah let us see the glow - I saw you on TV your swordfighting’s so cool’ 

‘omg do you have the sword?!’ 

I glanced up at the teacxher, but he gestured me up, seemingly as excited as the class, so I stood up awkwardly and closed my eyes, feeling warm glow wash over my body and lift me up into the air. I hovered there for a few seconds, laughing at their stunned faces then dropped back down 

‘yeah, I do have the sord but it’s Kinda attached to my suit so I can’t get it out’ I finished, still awkward 

‘Well since we have such an interesting new pupil I suggest we forgo today’s essay evaluation and get to know her – if that’s ok?’ said the teacher. I nodded, mildly terrified, and my classmates started firing questions at me. 

‘do you have the suit?’ 

‘um yeah - I have it in my bag – we have to keep it for emergency call-outs' 

‘can we see it’ 

‘um sure’ 

I touched the suit in my bag, feeling it glide seemlessly onto me, and carefully drew the sword from the loops on my back, holding it up for everyone to see. Once I had de-suited, the questions started again 

‘Why is your superhero or whatever name black wolf?’ 

I muttered quietly to LEX, and got permission to share the story 

‘ok, well basically it’s quite a long story but my sister was kidnapped before I was born by a place called the Red Room, and she was tortured and trained there to be a weapon, she managed to escape and they managed to destroy the red room but it turns out there was another one, and I was kidnapped and taken there, they usually train the girls, but they decided to do some twisted experiment on me, so after a lot of sleep deprivation, genetic manipulation and a shit ton of quite painful injections they got half way there, the original programme was called the Black Widow programme, hence my sister’s name, and they called me project Black wolf; if they managed to finish what they were doing to me I would have become a fully-fledged monster basically, but the Avengers managed to save me so here I am’ I said lightly 

They all sat in horrified silence, I grimaced, oops – maybe I had gone a little bit over the line. 

‘umm, so, if it’s ok to ask...what did they do to you – apart from the glow?’ whispered a girl next to me 

‘ i don’t quite know whether the full extent of it has been discovered yet, but so far I know about the glow, also at first everything I touched burned, but thanks to Shuri and her tech I can stay sane while I use my powers and the burn thing is like something I can turn on and off, I have enhanced strength too, something I discovered the other day, and I also have congenital analgesia, which means I don’t feel pain anymore, and...i can’t have kids’ I finished, giving a sarcastic thumbs up and laughing 

‘But I'm ok, the Avengers took me in, and I can use it for good now, in some weird way I'm grateful’ I say quickly, regretting telling them so much about me, and most likely starting pity rumours. 

‘any non-sensitive questions? You all look kinda terrified’ I asked lamely 

‘is it true you’re dating spiderman?’ piped up another. I flopped back down in my chair, more at ease now and pinched the bridge of my nose 

‘yeah - Petey’s a real sweetie though – not the tough guy he comes across as in the press’ 

The rest of the questions were pretty easy to answer, then the others told me a bit about themselves, and when the bell went for break, I had several people eager to show me where the manky courtyard-thing was. I was shooting hoops with the boy who had first recognised me (well I say that we were really throwing balled up paper through the rickety old basketball hoop outside) when my pager bleeped 

‘sorry hang on I need to check this’ I called, jogging back and pulling it out of my pocket – incoming call from Nat.. I frowned and pulled out my phone as it started buzzing, answering with a swipe and holding it to my ear 

‘Nat what’s happening – my pager went..’ but she cut me off 

‘There’s a shooter around the corner from you – Red's been paged too, Val’s on the phone with her now briefing her - I'll be there to pick you up in a few minutes but we four are closest and the shooter’s already struck once so we can’t wait’ 

‘dear god ok - I'll get suited and meet you and red asap’ I gabbled, sprinting back towards the group. I yanked my suit out of the bag, drawing it over me and running my hand over my head so that my hair weaved itself into my battle braids and called over my shoulder 

‘have to go can you tell mr...whatever sorry!’ 

I met with an anxious Red, fully catsuited as we sprinted around the corner and met Nat 

‘Flying’s quicker – car would just slow us down’ she panted as we met her, and we nodded and shot upwards. 

Nat briefed us as we flew towards the incident 

‘one shooter, injured two civilians, one seriously, Red you’re the best at medical stuff so you go and help them when we get there and henri, you clear the floor, I'll find the shooter, we have to take him down quickly. 

We touched down in the square, pandemonium reigning outside Primark and we sprinted inside, Red yelled and got instructions to where the injured civilians were, and I shouted instructions to everyone to get down. We had been given a profile of the shooter so LEX cleared all the civilians of suspicion as I scanned around. Then I saw him, he was over by a rack of t shirts, trying to blend in but LEX picked him out. I alerted Nat over comms but he saw me. He whipped round and fired, I ducked, vaulted over the t shirt display, slipping in a pile of crop tops and skidding along the floor after him. 

I skidded right into him and started to wrestle the gun from his grip, several huge cracks rang out as it fired, 

‘EVERYBODY STAY DOWN’ I yelled, frantically trying to keep the barrel pointed away from my face. I managed to grab it in glow and melted it in my fingers, but the man pulled a knife, he went to stab me, but I stuck out a leg and tripped him, I felt the knife cut down my side, but no pain came, I threw my sword aside and buckled the leather straps over the wound to stem the bleeding and vaulted back over the display, following him outside. 

‘эй, ты думаешь, можешь просто зарезать меня и уйти - грубо’ I shouted after him 

(hey, you think you can just stab me and leave – rude?!) and as he turned around, I shot out the staff, catching him in the jaw and pushing backwards so he flew to the ground. I wrapped fiery ropes of amethyst coloured glow around him, bent to where the knife had been dropped and melted it for good measure, then grabbed him by the scruff of the neck and dragged him back inside. Nat was looking frantically around, and when she saw me she sighed and raised an eyebrow, hands on her hips, the perfect image of widow disgruntlement. 

‘прости тетя нат, может я украл твой момент - но не волнуйся, я сделал это не идеально - меня зарезали’ (Sorry Auntie Nat, i may have stolen your moment, but don’t worry i didn't do it perfectly – i got stabbed) i grunted, handing him over to her. She snapped handcuffs on him and gave him to Red to hold, then she bent down, unbuckled the straps and inspected the wound in my side 

‘yeah it didn’t hit any organs – lucky you – but it went pretty deep so you need to go get it sewn up’ 

‘but I need to go back to school I must have missed half the day now and...’ 

‘NO EXCUSES, you can’t go back to school with a gaping stab wound so deep you can see the bone, even if you can’t feel it and as cool a story as that may be, you can go back ONCE YOU HAVE BEEN SEWN UP’ 

I sighed and held up my hands in defeat, then shot off to the ER, muttering angrily about overprotective aunts all the way. 

I landed just outside and trudged in, still in full suit and muttered 

‘LEX which one of these doctors sews fastest?’ 

LEX pointed me to a harried looking doctor who was shouting instructions at terrified looking younger doctors, they squeaked and pointed at me, taking in my suit and residual glow 

‘hey um, I know you probably have more important things to do but I really need to get this sewn up soon so I can go back to school - I'm missing homework and realistically..’ I grovelled, but I was interrupted 

‘I’ll do it’ an eager intern-looking doctor actually raised his hand and the one in charge nodded and waved him off. He lay me down on a bed so he could get at the cut and got a syringe of anaesthetic ready, I ripped off my mask and spoke 

‘nah don’t waste that stuff - I won’t feel the pain anyway – just go – and I'd probably recommend a vertical mattress suture to hold it – it went pretty deep’ 

He looked up in awe, setting down the needle and leaning back to ask the nurse for 4-0 vicryl. I lay back and let him get to work 

‘So how did you get this? Saving the city?’ he asked half nervous jokily, half serious 

‘Not exactly, shooter in a shop, pulled a knife, I tripped him with a t shirt display and got off easy’ i laughed 

‘how come it doesn’t hurt?! Are you just like really kickass and can deal with the pain or something?’ 

‘ha no way, that’s black widow you’re thinking of - I don’t feel pain it’s some genetic mutation – called congenital analgesia I think’ 

‘yeah, yeah it is but it’s really rare’ 

‘knowing my luck yup it probably is, but it comes in handy if you’re in the business of getting stabbed or shot or thrown out of windows a lot’ 

He looked shellshocked and started to ask a question, but I cut him off 

‘No I haven’t been thrown out of a window yet - I'm still technically a junior so they don’t give me big cases’ 

He nodded, laughing and finished up the stitches 

‘So, I would recommend that you don’t fight any like evil aliens or something for a few days to give yourself a chance to heal’ 

‘oh dang, I'll ask them to reschedule tomorrow’s stabbing bonanza’ I laughed, and nodded, swung my legs off the bed and signed the papers he offered me, then waved good bye and walked out of the door 

When I touched down in the playground-courtyard thing, I saw that they had left my bag in the corner, probably forgotten about it but I was grateful. I bent down behind a low wall and pulled off my suit, my clothes still underneath it, checked my watch, and swore under my breath 

‘дерьмо’ 

Then rushed inside to face the wrath of Miss Scott who’s lesson I was currently missing. I trudged into the classroom trying to be invisible, taking the desk at the very back...but I forgot about one thing 

‘oH mY gOd Is ThAt BlOoD aLl OvEr YoUr ShIrT’ shrieked a girl who had turned to look, and feinted in her chair. 

Miss Scott sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose and looking like she wanted to murder me 

‘MISS Belova I have already had Miss RED DAWN coming into class late covered in blood, have you been in the same ‘incident’ as she has or are you just showing the usual avenger insolence and inappropriateness as is per usual and deliberately disrupting my class’ I admired the fine sarcasm in her voice but attempted to keep a straight face 

‘No miss I'm sorry miss, I wouldn’t be late only I got minorly stabbed so of course I had to go to the hospital and then my doctor kept asking questions and I couldn’t...’ I trailed off the class started giggling, I ducked my head and fought back a smile 

‘WELL miss Belova, if you think for one second you can skip a class by throwing on some fake blood and a joke about prying doctors YOU ARE MISTAKEN. You will stay after school and catch up on the work you missed, and if you ever do this again, I will PERSONALLY make sure that you are suspended, just because you are an avenger does not mean you get special treatment, now, if we will, let us return to advanced molecular function’. 

I sat down, shellshocked, and pulled out my books. As Miss Scott’s back was turned a note was pushed into my hand from behind. I glanced down at it 

Did you really get stabbed?!!! 

I made sure miss Scott was faced away and lifted my shirt, twisting briefly round in my seat to show him. He let out an audible gasp and I winced, miss Scott spoke without turning round 

‘I sincerely hope that gasp was just in awe of the complex molecular processes and not miss belova drawing attention to herself again but I will give you the benefit of the doubt. ‘ 

I stayed silent for the rest of the lesson and soldiered through the rest of the day, not allowed to do PE in case I got a hernia much to my disgruntlement but enjoying the other classes a lot more than Miss Scott’s berating. 

I texted nat at lunch that I would be home later with a sad face emoji and after my last period, trudged towards Miss Scott’s class with a mounting sense of foreboding. 

As I pushed open the door, I saw three other wilted figures that she had ensnared for detention and, recognising one, sat down next to the girl with flaming pink hair. 

What you in for? 

I scribbled on a scrap of paper as Miss Scott set me extra homework and I started on it. 

Probably same as you – disrupting and missing class then turning up covered in blood – at least it wasn’t my own this time 

wrote Red 

Great, any idea when we’ll be out of here? 

Who knows? 

I sighed internally and two hours later I finished the last sum on the pile and took it to Miss Scott’s desk 

‘well done, you can go home now but I hope you’ve learnt your lesson’ 

I nodded meekly, fiery with anger at the unfairness of this on the inside and went to wait outside for Red. She didn’t take long, ten minutes later I saw her hurrying down the steps. 

‘ну это был дерьмовый день, пойдем домой’ (well that was a shitty day, let’s go home) 

Muttered Red and I nodded fervently. She laughed, throwing an arm around my shoulders 

‘Welcome to school kid, good luck getting out alive’ 

We laughed, then shot off together in the direction of Starks. 

As much as I wanted to go and collapse in bed as soon as we got home, I trudged up to the kitchen and pulled out my homework, spreading it across the half of the table that wasn’t taken up by Peter’s, and sighed 

‘How did your first day go?’ asked Carol. Red raised her eyebrow at me, and I took a deep breath 

‘Well let’s see, some boy recognised me from the press so instead of English my first lesson was a teacher approved Q&A session so now my classmates know a lot about me, then I was called out in the middle of it to go and stop a gunman, Nat disappeared so I managed to take him down myself, got stabbed, some intern at the hospital made a right hash of my stitches, then I went back, Miss Scott put me in detention for disrupting the class and said I can’t put fake blood on me and pretend to be saving the world to get time off school, put me in detention and now I have a mountain of homework’ 

The stood silently. 

‘mhmm - Bruce can you help me with this molecular physionomy whatsit it just looks like squiggles to me’ I asked, and he came to explain how it worked. 

I was mildly anxious to go back to school the next day after the yarfing, outing, stabbing, disrupting and detention, but I made myself get up, pull on some jeans and a hoodie and pack my bag. 

‘Hey - henri wasn’t it?’ I looked up, a boy carrying a plate of steaming filth on a blue plastic cafeteria tray was looking down at me as I sat on the steps outside, eating an apple 

‘mhmm’ I replied, swallowing the apple and gagging as it lodged in my oesophagus. The boy looked startled and after a second of choking came and Heimliched me 

‘thanks’ I wheeze 

‘oh shit’ said the boy, pointing at my side 

‘you’re bleeding!’ 

I twisted round and inspected my stitches, the were still intact but the edges that been starting to heal had blown and blood was trickling through 

‘ach no it’s fine - I just haven’t healed over yet – thanks for..well saving my life I guess’ I laughed, taking a packet of tissues out of my bag and pressing one against the wound till the bleeding stopped 

‘all of my best clothes are covered in blood now damnit’ I groaned 

‘umm - you can take my hoodie if you want’ he said, untying it from his waist. 

‘i smiled gratefully, pulling my own blood-soaked hoodie over my head and retying my blue band. I ripped off my t shirt and stuck a dressing over the stitches in case they decided to bleed again, then I pulled on his hoodie and extricated my hair from the neck 

‘thanks - Miss Scott probably would have had a fit if I'd turned up covered in blood again – sorry I probably should know but who are you?’ I asked 

‘oh, I'm Nick – ummm I'm Alex’s little brother – Iris's friend?’ 

‘oh, right you’re Shuri 2.0’s brother’ I laughed, and he nodded, sniggering at the nickname. 

It turned out nick was a potter nerd like me, so we discussed the potterverse for the rest of lunchtime and when the bell went, we scrambled to get to class. I caught up to him as he walked out at the end of the day. 

‘hey nick’ 

‘oh hi!’ 

He stopped walking and waited for me to catch up to him 

‘you want to come for tea?’ I asked, panting 

‘sure - I'll just call my mum’ 

He laughed as he took in my red face and my doubled-over-panting position and dialled his mum’s number. 

‘so I could get someone to come pick us up but it might be quicker just to fly there- you scared of heights?’ I asked, still breathless 

‘no! That. Is. Awesome' he said, and I laughed, lifted myself up in glow and grabbed his arm then shot home. we came down just outside and he stumbled over to a plant pot and vomited. I laughed and tossed him a polo. 

‘yeah takes some getting used to’ I wheezed as tears formed at the edges of my eyes 

‘oh shut up’ he groaned, punching me in the shoulder and I dragged him inside 

‘hey FRIDAY’ 

‘greetings mister/miss small glowing bean – which is it today just for reference’ I rolled my eyes at that 

‘it’s mister today but FRI please change my name in the system to something slightly less.... Natasha Romanov style’ I groaned 

‘sorry, no can do,’ said FRI. I rolled my eyes again 

‘can you approve access to Nick?’ I said and FRI scanned him 

‘Nicholas Miller, fifteen years old, freshman at your school..’ 

‘yeah yeah I know who he is – can we go up?’ I asked 

‘bringing the lift down now’ 

I pushed open the kitchen door and prodded Val out of the way 

‘nick this is...’ I looked around taking in who was there 

‘Natasha Romanov Hill, also Black widow’ Nat waved from the sink 

‘Captain Microwave the first aka Carol D’ Carol sighed but said hi 

‘You’ve probably met Red, this is her girlfriend Val, who is some heir of something or other – the current king of wherever the hell she’s future king of, Thor, who is still king, I think is...well I don't know where the hell he is – probably at another one of Loki’s funerals’ I speculated, and Val smiled mischievously 

‘Peter - spiderman – also known as spidey, ickle spiderboi and various other insulting names – also is my dumb boyfriend’ I laughed, ruffling his hair 

‘ugh third on the list thanks a lot Henri’ muttered Peter 

‘Dr Bruce Banner and Shuri – both geniuses and good for science homework help’ Shuri curtseyed 

Ummm... who’s left 

‘Em - or MJ or michelle - I honestly don’t know what she’s called anymore, also she’s blue lynx – our identities came out at the same time, and last but most certainly not least or she would probably cut my head off – my sister Lena 

‘who dis?’ asked Lena, from where she was sitting at the table holding a taser and a watermelon (I was interested to see the outcome of that) 

‘this is nick – school friend – also, don’t you dare tase that melon unless I'm watching I so want to see that’ 

she groaned and nodded, setting down the taser and bouncing out of the door 

‘just going to the gym I'll be back to do the tasing later’ 

‘hey henri why don’t you show nick round – it's quite a big place to get the hang of and if Lena’s cooking I wouldn’t count on tea any time soon’ said carol 

I agreed and tugged nick out of the door from where he was staring at my weird family in awe and took him down to the labs. 

When I pushed open the door to the intern lab, pandemonium reigned; some of the interns were flapping about trying to put out a fire, another one was laughing and took a huge gulp from the mug she was holding, then gagged ands spat out a load of thumbtacks and picked up a different mug from her desk, coughing, a few were...either asleep, gassed, dead or all three and lying on the floor, and some others with singed eyebrows were setting off periodic explosions and scribbling on clipboards. They all looked sleep-deprived, caffeinated and kind of like they had been electrocuted. Alex wasn’t here today, she was off on some course, and it seemed that without her, the intern lab had fallen to pieces. 

‘uurrrmmm I would say you’ve caught us on a bad day and they’re not always like this...’ I said, standing horrified on the threshold 

‘but would you be lying?’ asked nick, repressing a laugh 

‘maybe.’


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> so I didn't put this in the warning thing I forgot, there are suicide references and shooting, mentions of depression and death, also mentions of AIDS, homophobia and some swearing. wow it sounds awful.

‘Hey Henri do you think I can fit fifteen marshmallows in my mouth?’ pondered Peter 

I sighed 

‘i mean I'm sure you can but I don’t know if I’ll have a boyfriend at the end of it’ I laughed, 

Peter’s eyes widened in shock and he let out a muffled yell 

‘Whuhumefuhmmfuihimuffmuwlls!!’ 

‘ok you’re going to have to speak English...or russian or norse or sign language or something - I don’t understand marshmallow’ I wheezed 

You will break me for drinking candy?! 

Signed Peter....his signing was not flawless. He took a huge swallow, his eyes watering and started choking. 

‘Hey kid, how’s it going’ came a voice I didn’t recognise. Peter whipped around and started choking even more 

‘MFLE OMHE!!’ he yelled, which bought Stark and Thor running into the room to see if he was having a fit. 

As they looked up and saw the grinning man, Thor screamed and threw him across the room, he promptly turned into a bat and swooped down to sit on Tony’s head, then with a small pop he turned back into a human and Tony crumpled. 

‘am I missing something here...?’ I asked, standing perplexed in the middle of the pandemonium that reigned. 

‘fifteen marshmallows?’ asked the man, raising an eyebrow at Peter 

‘chicken. do twenty’ 

Thor finally found his voice 

‘Henri this is my brother Loki, who’s funeral I just got back from’ he said with gritted teeth and a glare at his smugly smiling brother. 

‘yeah sorry about that brother dear but I was absolutely swamped at that funeral – totally run over – literally, so I thought I'd pay you a housecall..aren’t you pleased to see me’ he laughed, pulling a sad face. 

‘ugh fine – but be prepared for death by Romanoff...if you’re lucky’ muttered Thor sulkily 

‘Hey Loki – not dead? Let's have a celebration dinner’ laughed Carol as they walked in and saw him, patting him on the back 

As Loki sat down at the table, the others started to fill him in on what had happened since they had last seen him – turns out it had been while I was away training so suffice to say he had missed a lot.. 

“WHAT THE HELL ROMANOFF HAD A BABY’ 

‘And she married Hill’ 

‘AND I DIDN’T GET INVITED?!!’ 

‘And Jones and Shuri got married’ 

‘THEY WHAT’ 

‘And Spidey got an SO’ 

‘NO WHO??’ 

I raised my hand meekly and Loki barrelled over to me, slamming me against a wall by the neck. 

‘if you hurt my baby spider I will dissect you...’ he growled. I held my hands out so he could see them burning and he shrieked and dropped me. I got rid of the burn and massaged my windpipe, wheezing 

‘Believe...cough...me...i have no...cough...intention..of...cough...doing that’ I choked out and he held out a hand to help me up. 

‘good.’ I collapsed back down at the table and finished my dinner 

‘right sorry to break this up so soon but I have a mountain of homework’ I groaned half an hour later 

‘ugh can’t you tell your teacher your uncle...sort of... came home so you couldn’t do it?’ whined Loki 

‘I want to find out more about you..’ 

‘no sorry – Miss Scott would skin me alive so we have to do the quick version; hi I'm henri you already know that, Yelena is my sister, I'm fifteen, I love cooking, my avenger's name is black wolf after the dodgy experiments the red room did on me, I can glow, burn stuff and have advanced strength from that and also do a ton of martial arts and fencing, I beat Val a lot at go-fish at two in the morning, I'm pretty violent and oh yeah also genderfluid – girl today – that enough?’. 

‘you sound like my kinda person, now run, go do your work so you can keep your skin and I'll see ya soon kid’ called Loki as I ran out of the room and grabbed my books. I waved as I left everyone laughing uproariously and went down to the labs to do my homework. 

I woke up the next morning and stumbled around like a zombie - I had been up till about 3 in the morning finishing my homework, then crawled onto bed and fallen asleep. 

‘MISS BELOVA I SINCERELY HOPE YOU HAVE PASSED OUT OR DIED AND ARE NOT JUST ASLEEP’ shouted Miss Sott. 

I jolted up, muttering apologies and being given a ton of extra homework and turned my attention back to the lesson. 

‘at least you have Banner to help with your science – that can’t be a hardship’ laughed Nick at break as I groaned and got started on the mountain. 

‘so thanks a lot for waking me up’ I said sarcastically. To my surprise he looked nervous and a bit serious 

‘what’s wrong with you?’ I asked 

‘i was going to wake you up...but I wasn’t sure if it would trigger you or something - I didn’t want to freak you out or embarrass you or anything..sorry’ 

‘aww you’re sweet but you don’t have to worry about that - I'm fine...or I was before I got a mountain of extra homework – she hates me and you know Red said she was pretty homophobic so maybe she hates me because I’m genderfluid’ 

I chewed the end of my pencil, checked my watch and started packing my stuff back into bag, I heard an ominous ripping sound and my bag exploded. 

‘ARRGGUUFFFNNN’ I yelled 

‘LEX am I authorised to use glow to carry my books?’ 

‘No sorry, your powers are not authorised to be used here’ 

‘uggghhhhh fine help me Nick’ I snapped, swearing in russian under my breath at LEXIE until Tony’s voice came out saying language and making me scream in shock. Nick was doubled over laughing so I gathered my books in a mess into my arms and grabbed him by the ear, dragging him with high-pitched yelps up to the language corridor. 

Soon it was the last day and we were all sitting through the mindnumbingly boring assembly, me levitating notes between students so they could make plans for later and trying not to shoot myself just for something to do. 

The assembly finally finished and we were free to go, I yanked myself up with Nicks help and slapped my leg until it regained feeling, then we hobbled outside and waited for Red just outside the school, sitting on the sunny wall at the bottom of the drive. She came ambling down the road chatting to Alex and we all walked round the corner into town; we split off and agreed to meet back up later and I put a dollar in the slot for the public loo. I wriggled out of my sweltering dress-code-appropriate jeans and shirt and pulled on a vest top and cargo shorts, then evacuated before I was gassed to death by the stench of public toilets. 

‘ugh dress codes are so crappy I nearly died in there – how is it fair that you can wear basically the same outfit as me but I get dress coded just because I’m a girl’ I complained, gesturing at his similar cargo shorts and tank top and he shrugged 

‘yeah it’snot fair and I have no doubt…literally no doubt that you’ll get your revenge but right now mint cho chip is calling me..’ I laughed and mock punched him, then we ambled off down the street to the ice cream cart. 

We decided to go and look in the shops given that we were both….low on clothes; ie reduced to wearing the same three outfits on rotation, so finished off our cones and traipsed into Primark. I dragged Nick to the boys section as he had absolutely no taste, and picked him out some stuff, then we went upstairs to the girls section and started browsing 

‘What about this’ he said, holding up a frilly bikini. I raised an eyebrow 

‘there Is no way I could fit into that and I work out about three times a day’ I laughed, he abandoned the bikini and pounced on a floaty dress 

‘errm what about this – it would really suit you…I think…probably’ he laughed 

‘no way. Not my style – however…’ I jumped up and whipped a pair of light purple dungarees that matched my hair off the rack. 

‘wow you’re good at this shopping thing’ he remarked, and tramped around after me as I stocked up on t shirts without holes in and shorts that hadn’t been owned by four people previously. 

I piled all our stuff into a bag at the till and we headed back out to sit by the fountain in the square to wait for Red and Al. 

‘hey I’m just gonna go back in – I think I left my phone in the changing room thingy’ nick said, bouncing up 

‘ok – don’t be long though if we’re going to make the film with the sisters’ I called. He waved a hand generically behind him and tripped over the scanners as he re-entered the shop. I sat with my feet in the fountain, periodically checking my watch until he came back out, one of his hands held weirdly behind his back. 

‘you find it?’ I asked, not really paying attention as I scanned the street for our godforsaken sisters’ 

‘nah I actually didn’t go in for that’ he said, pulling me back and tossing something at me, I caught it and turned it over. It was a yellow cap saying superhero in disguise in white letters across the front. I laughed and jammed it on my head 

‘ha thanks – I love it’ 

‘eh it was on sale and I thought it would make you laugh’ 

‘cheesy idiot..thanks, ugh FINALLY’ I said as I saw the sisters rambling down towards us 

‘HEY _ YOU ARE LATE WE’RE GOING TO HAVE TO RUN’ I yelled at them, Red checked her watch 

‘no we’re like ten minutes early…wait’ she tapped it, pulled out her phone and sighed 

‘damn it’s slow, come on’ 

We grabbed our bags and sprinted pell-mell down the street towards the cinema, and managed to get there just in time to run to the popcorn desk before the film started. 

The summer holidays went quicker than I wanted; between even more training given that I wasn’t in school, vast amounts of homework from Miss Scott which made the holiday slightly less enjoyable than it would have been otherwise, many pranks with various residents of the tower and hours spent with Clint and Tashie shooting arrows, soon it was the last evening before I started back. 

‘ha you’re going into the year of hell now aren’t ya’ laughed Shuri when I groaned, putting my homework into my bag for the next day 

‘yup. I mean Red, Peter and Em are doing A levels so they’re kind of in hell too but if tenth grade means I even get sympathy from the most cold-hearted person here I’m kinda scared now’ I moaned, and shuri kicked me under the table 

‘I’m literally too depressed to even kick you back now’ I whined and everypone laughed. 

‘Peter send your depressy boyfriend up to bed he’s bringing down the mood’ laughed Em, and without looking up from my face-on-the-table position I gave her the finger 

‘I would say language but…that kind of doesn’t work here – people stop winding henri up and henri…just….only do that to shuri’ sighed Tony, jerking out of the way pf an angry wakandan princess. 

I sighed and trudged up to bed, collapsing onto the sheets and falling asleep almost immediately. 

I woke up the next morning to the sun streaming through my window 

Weird I thought I’m usually up before first light 

I turned over and blearily peered at my alarm clock. It hadn’t gone off. I was due at school in half an hour 

‘дерьмо дерьмо дерьмо дерьмо дерьмо дерьмо’ I yelled, punctuating mmy every movement with Russian swearing. This motivated me to move faster and within five minutes I was fully showered and dressed, sprinting along to the lkitchen while I dragged a comb through my straggly hair. Everyone laughed as I crashed through the doors and Carol tossed a banana and my school bag at me. 

‘Red’s waiting out the front and Tony’s taking you today’ 

I yelled gratefulness over my shoulder and sprinted down the stairs, pulling a jacket on over my t shirt and jamming my hair up under the cap nick had given me. 

‘sorrysorrysorrysorrysorry here now let’s go’ I called, galloping down the steps two at a time then tripping and falling down the next set, rolling along the gravel and landing by the door of Tony’s car. Red was in stitches so I threw her into the car and climbed in after, slamming the door shut and collapsing on the leather seat, peeling my banana. 

She carried on laughing for the duration of the ride and was still laughing when she waved me off to my classroom ten minutes later. I collapsed in my chair just before Miss Scott came through the doors and breathed a sigh of relief. 

‘Hello class, as you know you’ll be taking your GCSE’s this year and I fully expect…’ I zoned out as Miss Scott droned on and relaxed my breathing, I looked over at Nick, repressing a laugh as he looked at me and raised an eyebrow, his non-laughter intensified, and I bit my lip to stop myself laughing at him. 

I was dozing off, basking in the warmth of the sun coming in through the window as Miss Scott’s droning voice went on, when a crack rent the air, ripping me from my daydreams 

A gunshot 

Miss Scott stopped abruptly. 

Another crack sounded. 

‘Right everybody under their desks’ she shouted as an alarm blared. I pulled my suit out from my bag and transformed into Black wolf, Lex testing the comms. I went to run out of the door towards the noise but Miss Scott pulled me back 

‘No all students have to stay here, it’s not safe’ 

‘it’s my job.’ I hissed back 

‘I’m the one who has to make it safe’ she hesitated but let go 

‘be careful’ 

As I reached out my hand to open the door it turned under my fingers and the door slammed open. I crouched down behind it and watched through the keyhole. A man in a hoodie and a balaclava walked in, a gun in his hand. A .22 calibre pistol. Nasty thing. 

He raised the gun and aimed it at random under the cluster of desks, as he lifted his arms I saw packs of bullets in his pockets, I counted. 

‘Where is Louise Scott’ he said gruffly. Before anyone could answer Nick stepped out from under the desk 

‘She’s not here. I promise she’s not here. I think she’s in…the science labs..what do you want with her?’ 

‘you ask too many questions’ grunted the man. He pulled the trigger. 

I saw it all in slow motion. 

Nick was thrown backwards across the desk with the force of the bullet. He landed with a crash on the other side of the desk, a stain spreading slowly across his chest as he convulsed, his eyes wide. I sped over to him, throwing people out of the way and grabbed the hoodie from the back of his chair. It was the one he had lent me that day we met, it still had a vague stain of my rusty red blood on the side. The shooter pulled the trigger again but I body blocked the others, the bullet pinged off the back of my suit, inches away from my uncovered abdomen. He looked at the gun in shock and ran back out of the room, slamming the door. 

‘Nick stay with me you have to stay awake I know it hurts but you have to stay awake’ I gabbled, my voice cracking. I bundled up the hoodie and pressed it hard against the wound. His eyes were flickering 

‘nick stay with me, talk to me anything just stay conscious’ I whispered. He drew in a shuddering breath 

‘you always have to have it your way’ he wheezed. I laughed a little through the tears. 

Henri. Henri talk to me what’s happening Red’s voice filled my head. 

A shooter. Came into..my class looking for..miss scott but nick said she wasn’t here..the shooter..shot him 

Is he alive 

Yes...only just though 

I’m sorry but you have to leave him, you have to help me stop this guy before he hurts anyone else 

Ok. 

Good, get Lexie to show you where the guy is, and we’ll find eachother 

I heard another crack..twice – it was faint in real life, but I heard it loud in my head 

Red. Red. Iris are you ok …RED 

Ach No it’s ok I’m here 

‘are you ok 

Yeah I just..stubbed my toe 

Give me a minute and I’ll find you 

I’m in the loos by the science block 

Ok 

She slipped out of my mind and I came back 

‘nick NICK stay with me stay awake’ I hissed. he was so pale 

‘umm’ I scanned the people behind me 

‘you – you scared of blood?’ I hissed at a girl behind me 

‘no’ 

‘you gonna faint?’ 

‘no’ 

‘good, come sit next to him and hold the hoodie down – keep the pressure on - don’t worry about hurting him – he's in worse pai. And he won’t feel it – just don’t let it start bleeding again, don’t move him at all till the ambulance crew come and keep him talking’. I said, and she took my place 

‘Miss Scott?’ I whispered, she looked up at me, paper white 

‘You need to call the police, and an ambulance, quickly’ she nodded and I ran to the door, leaving a smear of blood on the handle 

I found Red in the loos where she said she would be 

‘He went off that way – he came into my class first – shot into the crowd – hit a girl in the shoulder but I packed it and she’s ok – they’re lying low and calling an ambulance’ I nodded grimly 

‘wait what did you pack it with’ 

‘Tampons’ 

‘oh – clever’ 

‘I live to please’ she breathed, and half a smile ghosted my lips. We heard a volley of cracks coming from down the hall, the colour in Red’s face drained and she pulled on her suit and mask, then we ran silently down the corridor. I peeked in through the window, the class were cowering under the desks, hands over the heads as the shooter ricocheted bullets around the room, the screams were muffled through the window but I saw people crumple, we had to go in, we couldn’t wait. 

‘Right when we get in there, i’ll distract him, you get them all out and…check if any of them are dead, if they’re alive plug their wounds and try and keep them that way. ‘ 

Red said urgently 

‘if you have to, body block them, your suit is bullet proof but yours only covers your chest and your arms and legs so try and avoid getting shot in the middle’ 

My jaw shook but I nodded, cursing Tony for giving me a two piece cropped top in my girl suit instead of a full body one, but preparing. 

Red threw open the door and we ran into the room. The shooter whipped around and aimed at us but she leapt in front of me, the bullet pinging off her. I bent over and hurried to the window, not looking back. I threw it open and ushered the terrified students out. 

Another crack 

Another 

Three 

Four 

Five 

Six 

A lull. 

I called out telepathically to Red 

He only has one bullet left, I counted when he came in 

Ok 

I crawled over to the bodies, I counted six. Five had no pulse. The last one had a major abdominal wound, haemorrhaging blood but still just breathing. I packed her wound with everything I could find and stuffed abandoned jumpers under her hips to keep her wound above her heart – it was all I could do for now. 

I turned round, Red was panting, trying to spar with the man but unable to pull off her usual moves. I crept up behind him and kicked the gun from his hand, then dug my fingers into his neck, I scrabbled till I found his carotid artery, and pressed down hard. He crumpled immediately and I bound him in glow. 

I turned around, Red had collapsed on the floor, her face pale. A pile of bloody cotton was lying in the floor next to her and her suit was unzipped at the front, blood was seeping through her white shirt onto the floor. Cold panic flooded over me. I skidded across the floor, slipping in the blood and crashed down next to her. I slapped her pale face 

‘Red come on, Red…red, iris stay with me’ her eyelids fluttered. I realised she must have been shot when we lost communication while I was with Nick, we had been together ever since, she had tried to plug the wound like she had done with the girl in her class but the blood flow and the exertion had been too much. 

I felt as if the sound had been sucked from the world. Police flooded in, interrogating me and I answered numbly. They heaved up the half-conscious shooter and took him out, speaking words I couldn’t hear into a radio. Soon ambulance crew flooded in and hurried the wounded out on a stretcher. They tried to pull me away from Red but I wouldn’t let go so they loaded me onto the gurney with her and through the corridors, out the front door into a waiting ambulance. I held her hand as they unloaded her at the hospital, the same one I had gone to for my stitches three months before. 

They rushed her into the OR, but hands held me back as I tried to follow. A faceless person wearing blue scrubs directed me to the waiting room. I collapsed into a scratchy chair, panic and fear washed over me in waves. My head was so full, images raced around, my breathing fast and irregular, my head span as if I was drowning, struggling for air. I don’t know how long I sat there, holding tightly to the ring on its chain around my neck like a life jacket. 

People flooded in around me, the others had got wind of it. My sister sat next to me and held my hand, helping me through and my breathing slowed, Val, Nat, Carol, Clint, Tony, Bruce, Thor and Shuri stood anxiously around me. I recognised a face behind them, Alex. She didn’t know her brother had been shot, all she knew about was Red. I stood unsteadily and walked over to her, taking her hand, it was ice-cold and clammy. 

‘I’m sorry..but…he came into..our classroom and nick…he..’ I couldn’t finish my sentence but she understood, she let out a small groan and her knees buckled. 

We sat in that waiting room for hours. We didn’t talk, or play games like we had waiting for Aly, we weren’t reassured they would be fine like with Em. The truth was I prepared myself for the worst in that waiting room. I prepared to kiss goodbye to my newly cleared mind. I had been moving on, I had been happier, I had felt cured. I almost, although I never admitted it, almost hated Nick and Red for taking that clarity away from me. I almost despised them for sending me back to my old self. 

I was so deep in my thoughts, so despairing that I would ever have any kind of peace again that at first, I didn’t notice when the nurse came out. She circled around the others in the waiting room, the parents and siblings of the victims. The girl Red had helped had survived, and so had the girl I had packed the wound with before helping Red, I watched families deflate and crumple as the nurse apologised for the deaths of the students who had already lost their pulses when I got there. Eventually she circled round to us. 

‘you’re waiting for… Iris and Nick?’ we all nodded tentatively and her face relaxed 

‘their surgeries went as well as expected, Iris lost a large part of her liver but it will have almost no effect on her life, the portion she lost will regenerate and she’ll face no change in her quality of life, she can leave in a week or so and be back to normal in a month. nick wasn’t quite as lucky, the wound weakened his heart wall, but the surgeons inserted a pacemaker, and there is medication he can take, as long as he’s careful there’s no reason, he shouldn’t live a full life too, his recovery will take a little longer but he should be out of here within the month’ 

Numb shock and relief washed over me like a warm fire. 

‘can we see them?’ croaked Alex 

‘They won’t wake for several hours but, yes you can see them’ said the nurse with a smile. 

While the others went to sit with Red, Alex and I took our seats either side of Nick’s bed. Exhaustion took over Alex and she was asleep, holding his hand, her head resting on the bed next to him in minutes. I drifted on the edge of sleep for hours, bought back when I felt his fingers twitch in mine. 

‘Urgh god. Heartburn’s a bitch’ he muttered, I looked up, a smile on my face 

‘you haven’t changed at all. There’s me thinking being shot might make you grow up’ I whispered 

‘nah I wouldn’t appease you so easily. I’ll annoy you till the end’ 

‘fine I concede, but no more jumping in front of bullets – the stress isn’t good for my heart let alone yours’ I said and he raised an eyebrow and chuckled softly 

‘touché and ugh – nitpicky – I seem to remember you jumping in front of a few bullets too – I’d say your job is more stressful than my antics’ 

‘I aim to please’ I laughed quietly 

‘you should wake your sister up – she’s worried about you – I’ll give you two time’ I whispered, squeezing his hand and standing up 

‘fine but don’t leave me with her for to long – she’s an emotional type’ he groaned. I rolled my eyes and slipped out of the door, following the corridor to Red’s room. 

Only Val and Nat remained, the others having gone home to get some things for Red. She was awake, groggy but talking to Val who held her hand, Nat asleep beside her 

‘you idiot’ I sighed, leaning against the doorframe 

‘you absolute idiot. Why didn’t you tell me he shot you? And how the hell did you keep going for so long?’ I walked into the room and leant on the edge of her bed 

‘what can I say’ she shrugged 

‘adrenalin’s a great painkiller. But you saved my life. so thanks’ 

‘I hope you learn your lesson though – you were lucky – you’ll be out in a week and probably up and about in a month but I expect my sisters and your girlfriend are going to skin you alive next time you do this’ 

‘fine I’ll try not to get shot again but I’m making no promises’ she said, and I relaxed, laughing 

‘you should go get checked out though Henri – you might’ve done something without realising’. 

I nodded and headed downstairs to the ER. I lay on a bed, being prodded poked and then in scanners for what seemed like ages. 

I was lying in the x-ray room being scanned when I heard voices coming from the control room, they had forgotten to turn off the tannoy. 

‘yeah that weird girl’s back – the one who can’t feel any pain – you know she tore a ligament and managed to walk around without noticing – she’s probably broken a ton of bones – they told me to be extra thorough’ 

‘oh my god she literally can’t feel pain?’ 

‘no I know! Wait the images are up…..what the fuck?’ 

‘oh my God’ 

My blood ran cold, what had they seen, what was wrong. They left me lying there for ages, although it probably wasn’t more than a few minutes. 

When they let me out they looked at me oddly, like they had found out I was a robot or something. They told me to call my parent or guardian so I paged Carol and after a few minutes they came running it 

‘what’s wrong’ 

‘please sit down’ said the doctors, glancing at eachother. One hesitated, then spoke 

‘Given your congenital analgesia, we were told to be thorough to ensure you had no injuries, so we decided to do an x-ray to check for fractures.’ he stopped, seemingly unable to find tbe words. 

‘and?’ said Carol urgently’is Henri ok, has..she hurt herself or broken bones or..’ 

‘no’ said the second doctor, leaning forward and taking over 

‘you have no broken bones, but we wanted to discuss something we saw on the x-ray' 

‘what did you see?’ I said quietly 

The doctor shifted uncomfortably, he looked as though he was about to tell me I was dying 

‘it seems that all your bones...aren’t...made of bone, we can’t be quite sure and we may have to do a biopsy, but it seems they are made..of metal.’ 

I closed my eyes. Of course – how could I have thought the Red Room wouldn’t have done something like this. They wanted their very own invincible monster so that’s what they had nearly got. My body wasn’t mine anymore, full of their chemicals, their experiments, their bones. I was just a vessel for their barbary. 

The doctors carried on talking, saying my joints still worked perfectly, they wanted to do tests, and a study. I sat there silently, not listening. suddenly I just couldn’t take it anymore. I stood up abruptly, knocking over my chair, and ran out of the door. 

I ran down the corridors, the walls closing in on me, the ceilings closing in, my head spinning. I burst out of the doors and collapsed on a bench, trying to breathe. It was after a few minutes that I noticed miss Scott sitting on the bench next to me. 

‘who was he.’ I said 

‘who was the shooter.’ her face was paper white and when she spoke, her voice was gravelly. 

‘my brother...was always...different. A few years ago he got married. To a man’ she shuddered and I clenched my teeth 

‘i said I wouldn’t go to the wedding. And I didn’t. If you could even call it a wedding.’ she paused, looking up at the clear evening sky. 

‘i didn’t..i haven’t seen him since we argued about the wedding. Six months ago they diagnosed him...with...with AIDS. I knew it was only a matter of time but he wasn’t the brother I grew up with. As far as I was concerned he had died long ago. A couple of weeks ago he was admitted to hospital with the flu. He asked to see me, he knew he was going to die but I said no. I refused to see him. He died a week later. I didn’t go to the funeral. The man..the shooter..was his...his husband.’ tears slipped down her face and my jaw dropped, my forehead creasing in anger. 

‘no.’ she looked up at me. 

‘no you don’t get to cry. You don’t get to be sad. You did this. You disowned your brother for who he chose to love. This is the twenty-first century GROW UP. Your hate, your prejudice, your mistreatment of people got nine people shot. it got five innocent people killed, it got one of your students so badly injured he’ll be reliant on medication for years. The accident that you caused made me find out horrible things. so you don’t get to cry’ I looked at her in disbelief for a few seconds. 

I stood up, surrounded myself in glow and shot up into the sky, forcing myself forward, flying fast. The tears streamed down my face, flying out behind me as I soared over the city. I landed on a rooftop, looking out across the sky and screamed. I screamed at my demons. I thought I had beaten them. I screamed at the far away prisoners, the people who had destroyed my life, who had mutated me into this. I screamed at the hate and the destruction. I screamed at every person who had dug the hole of my depression a little deeper. When night fell, stars sprinkled across the sky, I returned home. I went numbly up to the roof and sat on the edge, numbed by pain, wrecked by grief and anger. 

I stayed there till morning when Carol found me 

‘you don’t have to do the tests’ 

‘no. I will. My body isn’t mine anymore so why should I have a say in what I do with it’ I said quietly, my back to them. 

‘no’ whispered Carol 

‘you are entirely your own.’ 

‘whatever. The interns need to learn and they’ll never see anything like this again. I’ll do it.’ 

‘ok. We have to go back there in about an hour then, but any time you want to stop tell me. We’ll stop’ 

I didn’t signal I had heard. They knew I had. I went and changed, walking silently into the kitchen. 

‘let’s go’ 

Do you..want me to come with you?’ asked Peter, Lena looking up too. I shook my head, and walked out, waiting for Carol out the front. 

An hour later I was lying in the x ray booth again, dressed in a gown. I looked away from the control room. I didn’t want to see them looking enthusiastically at me. I didn’t want proof that I was a specimen in a cage. They put me back in a hospital bed after the x-ray. I looked away at the needles. 

I wasn’t squeamish. But they reminded me of the red Room. Something I would never forget. 

I knew by the end of the day. I knew I couldn’t do this. I couldn’t do life. I couldn’t do love. I couldn’t do me. 

I stood near the edge of the roof. The breeze gently rippled the hair, making the tears on my face sting cold. The whistling in my ears took over. All I could hear was the wind. The birds. The traffic below. I didn’t look down. I wanted to fall without landing. Where grief numbed the senses, death heightened them. I thought of the passage at the end of harry potter, describibng his walk into the forest. To death. It made me think of Nick. Lying in a hospital bed. I couldn’t think of him. Not now. I cleared my mind . Finally my clarity had returned. Peace had returned. I closed my eyes and let out a slow breath, feeling the last breeze on my skin. 

The wind blew my short hair back in a gentle breeze and I walked slowly over to the edge. The ground plummeted low beneath me, 100 stories of steel and glass the only thing between me and concrete. 

But if I step. 

Nothing. 

Nothing to stop me shattering as I hit the floor, but everything to stop the noise. The constant screaming noise in my head of doubt, doubt and hatred and every cruel twisted thing. 

Lean 

My body probably won't even shatter. 

Only my metal bones will be left there, maybe I'll be mourned. Maybe they’ll forget me. 

Lean 

The world will go away. 

I don’t believe in God, but maybe, just in this moment I will, so I can hope, can dream that someone will look out for those I leave behind. 

Thank you Avengers. 

You’ve saved so many lives, but I’ll just be one of those you can't 

The girl with steel bones 

The boy with the violet hair 

The girl with the powers 

The boy with no family 

I did it 

I leant 

The ground wasn’t below my feet anymore, but I seemed to hover, waiting to feel something, anything. Regret? Maybe? Anything to make me turn on my powers and save my own life 

But I didn’t. 

They say when you die the world slows down. 

Maybe I wasn’t dying because it sped up. 

Every thing happening in a blur, a blur of sound, of sight as the sky grew above me. 

The last thing I heard was screaming. Maybe it was my screaming. I never found out 

I would have wished it to be something else. 

Maybe Lena and Nat laughing, or Aly’s little snores when she slept, Red’s writing or Vals singing. 

Even Peter saying ‘I love you’ for the last time. 

The scream stopped 

The pain stopped 

The thoughts. The doubt, the hurt, the hatred, they all stopped. 

They say when you die the world slows down. 

It doesn’t 

It stops 

I leant forwards and my feet left the roof. Finally the end of this hell was here. I expected blackness to take over, numbness to wash over me. Unfeeling. But it didn’t. I felt the ground. It hadn’t worked. Of course. Steel bones. Steel skull. Steel armour. They wouldn’t make it that easy. 

I stood up numbly and walked back inside. I wasn’t even allowed a moment of clarity. A moment of peace. I found myself sneaking into the medbay. Taking a scalpel. Going back to the roof. The roof was my respite. Up there nothing could touch me. Nothing could drag me back to my problems. This was my place. But I couldn’t live like this. I had to try again. The blade glinted in the sun. some might say it looked evil, but to me it shone like an angel, like kindness and peace. Like the future. I went to draw it across my wrist. I felt no pain. The one thing I was grateful for. I couldn’t have done this if it caused me more pain. Whether that’s cowardly or brave I don’t know. Maybe it was neither. The last thing I saw before my eyes went out of focus was the sun. the light drawing me into the end. 

The flashbacks came as I step out onto the edge, the ground half beneath my feet and air between the rest. I didn’t expect it. I didn’t expect to have flashbacks whn it only happened a few minutes ago. 

I cant lean. 

I cant step over again, I cant subject the others to that again. 

Me. I could take it. 

Me. I could end it. 

Maybe this time it’ll happen properly, the world will slow down. Nat says time seemed to stop when she died. Maybe it’ll stop for me. 

I slowly reached up and took the necklace of my neck, smiling softly down at the ring before I place it ono the ground near where I stand. 

I hoped that would be wqhat Ppeter saw. Not my body. After all it wasn’t mine anymore 

I took the scalpel I took from the hospital out of my pocket and looked down at it 

Cut. Then jump. Simple. 

I won’t survive this time 

The group won't have me in the hospital bed, spend the days around me, paying games and fake smiling through the treatments and healing. 

I hold the knife to my wrist 

I clear my mind 

I love you Peter Parker 

I love you Natasha Romanoff 

I love you Yelena Belova 

I love you Ir- 

‘It’s not worth it’ a soft, husky voice spoke behind me and I spun around. Red was standing there, tears slowly making their way down her face and she watched me sillouetted against the skyline 

‘Red?’ I asked softly digging the knife to my wrist, the sharp pressure of the blade not yet drawing blood 

‘It’s not worth it’ She repeated, coming slightly closer and pulling her long-sleeved sweater tighter around her 

‘Please leave’ I pleaded, turning back away from her to face the edge but she didn’t stop coming further towards me, her face blank of any expressions 

‘Henri. Think. Don’t do this, it's not worth it’ she said. Again 

‘YOU CANT SAY THAT’ I yell suddenly, snapping ‘YOU CANT UNDERSTAND, YOU CANT KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE, KNOW ITS NOT WORTH IT’ 

Red hesitated slightly then she walked up to be quickly and pulled me roughly away from the edge, 

‘dont you dare say that’ she growled in my ear, forcing me down onto the bench and snatching the knife away 

‘you do not know that, you do not know what each person has been through’ 

‘don’t talk to me like that Red, everyone says they know what it’s like, that they understand, but they don’t. They weren’t the ones who chose to fall’ 

Red stopped for a moment, seeming to have an internal battle with herself, then, still staring straight into the sunset and refusing to meet my eye she pulled off her jumper. 

‘I didn’t choose to fall’ she whispered 

Then I saw them. All over her arms, from the top of her shoulder to her wrists are covered in tiny scars, sticking out pale and thin againt her tanned arms. They cross each other occasionally, varying from a centimetre long to about 5 inches, each one looking deep and painful and deliberate 

‘you....you’ I stammered out, unable to find the words 

‘I didn’t fall. But I do understand’ she states, finally meeting my eye ‘I did it a lot, then nearly killed myself. Then came here, found a life, a cause, then ruined it. Nearly cut a major artery. Brunn found me seconds before it would have been too late’ 

Se sighed deeply and rubbed her arms 

‘Like I said. Not worth it’ 

‘But maybe that’s just you. Maybe it just wasn’t worth it for you. Maybe it will be for me. I’ll finally be me again. Not some broken shell of me trapped in a body that isn’t mine. Chemicals and blockers in my brain. Metal in my bones. Every day is a fight and I'm choosing to surrender because I'll never win. I'm choosing to surrender before I'm beaten.it might not be worth it for you’ I whispered, taking the scalpel and turning away 

‘but it’s worth it for me’. 

She came and stood in front of me. Grabbed me by the arms and forced me to look into her eyes. 

‘your life is shit. I won’t deny it. You’ve been through more than most of us. And you haven’t had the support most of us had. But please. The world needs you. You save people. You save them from themselves. You save them from others. You save them from evil. People need you. Peter needs you. Em needs you. Nick needs you. I need you. I really do.’ 

She reached forward and brushed my tears away 

But more important than us you need you. You need to stay alive. You need to trust you will get better. Life is like...an arrow. you will keep getting pulled back. You will, but it will make you fly. This pain will make you stronger. Your body is your own. Your mind is your own. It was stolen away from you and torn apart. It will hurt to put it back together. But it’ll be worth it. I promise’ she finished softly. 

I still cant conprehend this, Red has her life togther, she has her girlfriend, her Avenger’s family, sees her real biological family every week 

‘why?’ I ststammer out and she seems ot think for a moment 

‘the world... it spins so fast. Stuff happens, shit happens to you and it spins faster and I just couldn’t keep up. The world was carrying on around me and if i I was frozen in time, I couldn’t change anything, I couldn’t do anything amazing with my life, I couldn’t change the world, but my mind.... my mind wanted too, it’s just’ she sighs again and fiddles with a strand of her hair 

‘the constant noise in your head. The screams of your thoughts and the cries of your imagination’ 

I nod mutely, then take the knife out again ‘so you understand why I have to do it’ I whisper holding it against my wrist. 

I expect her to shout, pull her off, take the knife off me, call someone for help but she just studies my face for a moment, looking so like Nat as she does it’s disconcerting. Both seem to be able to read your soul. 

Then she snaps her fingers, in a second a dome is light up around us and a knife in her hand, not a scalpel like mine but wooden, with a gem set into the handle and a sharp, wicked little blade. Rusty colour stains the handle and I realise with a flip of my stomach it's not rust. It’s blood. 

‘The dome is invisible and sound proof. They won't find us’ she said, then hold the knife against her own wrist, mirroring my position. 

‘You cut. I cut’ she said, looking me straight into the eye 

‘You can't do this Red, I don’t want you to do this’ I pleaded as she dug the knife further into her flesh like mine. She didn’t even flinch even though I knew it was painful. 

Her face was blank of emotion as she looked down to her left arm 

‘You think I won't do it’ she challenged ‘You think I can't do it’ then with a small smile she pointed so a small 4 cm long scar on her bicep 

‘I thought that too the first time, then the second, then the third’ with each number she pointed over her arm and labelled the different scars 

‘it feels like this is the end of the chapter Henri, I know that. It feels like the story that can't end with a happily ever after, but this isn't the book, this is a chapter’ 

‘you have a girlfriend you can't leave her’ I shouted but she just snorted softly 

‘You have a boyfriend’ 

‘you have Nat’ 

‘You have Yelena’ 

‘you have a family goddamnit Red, you have your own bloody biological family’ 

The red-head stopped for a moment and looked thoughtful 

‘3’ she stated 

‘3 what?’ I asked 

‘I told you i’d nearly killed myself twice. I’ve nearly killed myself 3 times’ she murmured to herself. In that moment I took my opportunity, digging the knife further into my skin, no pain. 

Further. Nothing 

Further. The noise was still there 

Further. The screams were not silenced 

I looked down at my wrist and saw the knife halfway through it. Not cutting but almost as if it’s going through a hologram, an illusion. I looked up at Red disbelievingly and she shrugged, the red glowing around her head the only indication of her powers 

‘I’m not letting you make my mistake’ she said ‘Val nearly left. Nat wouldn’t talk to me. Peter tiptoed around me for ages. Shuri tried to fix me too much’ 

‘im not making-’ 

‘yes, you are’ 

‘I don’t have a family’ She said, corner of her mouth twitching into a smile 

‘What?’ 

‘I don’t' 

‘But you...you leave - every Sunday at 12 you leave, go for lunch and come back 4 hours later - you bring Val sometimes you see them’ I yelled, confused why she’s lying 

‘I don’t even know where my parents live’ She said, looking into the distance 

‘They disowned me almost 2 years ago. Said I wasn’t their daughter if I glowed and kissed girls’ 

she pouted slightly 

‘went binary when I wasn’t ready, nearly burnt my heart out, Nat saved me. Again. Don’t do that’ 

‘What?’ I ask again, trying to process the information 

‘Don't make your family have to save you’ 

‘I know the feeling. And it’s all too easy to let it take over. But if you do it, I'll do it. If you kill yourself, it will hurt so many people, it will cause so much pain. so I want you to see the pain in my eyes before you die, I want you to see the suffering you will cause so that you’re sure it’s worth it.’ 

She raised an eyebrow, holding the knife to her wrist. Not backing down but backing away from me a little and we both looked down at the scalpel in my hand. It was still shining. But now I saw the evil. It had lured me into thinking it was the only way out. It was lucifer in the disguise of Gabriel. But I wasn’t fooled anymore. As we looked, my hand glowed and I burned it. Disintegrated it. Hell, I was Henri Belova. And Belovas didn’t take the easy way out. We fought. We cried. But we got back up and won. And Red was right. I could win. 

‘thank you’ I muttered. She vanished her own knife 

‘no.’ I said, my voice stronger and she looked up in confusion. 

‘not good enough’ I laughed, shaking my head and holding out a hand. I burnt her knife too. 

‘You saved me. But I'm not strong enough to save you if I must. I don’t have the words. And I don’t think you have the strength to save me again. So, we’ll make a pact. Neither of us do it. If we want to, we remember this. And we hold off for eachother. We hold off so we can find a reason not to.’ 

A tear slipped down her cheek and she nodded. 

‘i have an idea.’ she whispered. 

We stood in line the next day. Waiting for our fresh start. We were in a tattoo parlour – not the traditional place for a new start I know. We were both there to get the same tattoo. We had agreed on the roof. A semi-colon. The symbol for when the author could have chosen to finish the sentence, but they chose to continue. When we wanted to end the sentence, we could look at our wrists. And we could choose to continue. 

We had stitched up eachothers cuts that day, we had moved on and we didn’t want questions dragging us back. 

I had accepted that I would never ‘get better’ and that that was ok. I would never be normal, free of demons or bad dreams. I would have good days, and I would have bad ones, and that I could accept my demons and sit with them for a while, made the fight all that much easier. 

‘you ready?’ Red’s face, full of excited anticipation appeared in front of mine. I took a deep breath and nodded, walking into the booth and leaving the old me behind.


	4. chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hey so yeah last chapter was kinda sad but I have a funny field trip now so I hope you enjoy it!

‘OI’ I shouted, as Val yanked my head round. 

‘Your hair is already short, if you want me to braid it I need to concentrate and I need you STILL’ she reprimanded and, on remembering she had a very real and very sharp sword attatched to her I submitted to the yanking and sat still. 

It was two weeks since the shooting, 12 days since red saved my life and eleven since we got the tattoos. School was going back, Nick too, and I was getting ready. 

‘Hey Henri, did you get the email?’ asked red anxiously 

‘no what email? I asked through gritted teeth as Val did another warning yank 

‘urm the one that says the school wants to thank us in assembly and give us awards’ she said, grimacing. My heart sank – treating us like heroes? I hadn’t been able to save the five students that had died. If we had gone into the room earlier they may not have – we weren’t heroes. 

‘Nooo’ I groaned. She tapped her wrist twice, our secret signal you can get through this and I sighed. 

‘Fine. Do we have to wear the suits or..’ 

‘nah we don’t but I think we should probably wear black – respect’. Said Red, biting the top off a banana 

‘i’ll find you some stuff – think your only black thing is your leather jacket and I don’t think that’s the right vibe’ 

I half grimaced half smiled in gratitude and was released by val, my hair braided in rows in the same style I had admired hers in. 

Red came jogging back in a few minutes later and tossed me some black jeans and a black shirt 

‘that should fit you’ 

I went upstairs and pulled them on, then packed my books and we walked out the door. 

‘i wish they hadn’t done this - I feel guilty – those people died because we didn’t go in soon enough’ I muttered and we walked along the street 

‘i know the feeling – you just have to think of it like, they would have died anyway, you did your best and you managed to save three people – yes five people died, but because of you – three didn’t - includong me – and that’s what you have to think when they thank you.’ 

‘yeah that helps’ I said, nodding my head and smiling a little. 

We went to sit back down half an hour later, after a long winded thank you from the principal, scarlet in the face and avoiding everybody’s eyes. The principal droned on for another half an hour, and I was bought back when I heard him mention our names 

‘without sounding disrespectful i feel our 10th and twelfth grade need a lift after this awful incident, and Iris and Henri have provided me with an idea – we have arranged a field trip of sorts to the avengers compound – it will be a learning experience, a chance to meet the scientists and discuss internships, but also a chance to meet some of your heroes and..have a little fun’. 

I sat frozen, glancing over at Red, whose face bore the same expression as mine. 

Oh shit. 

Oh shit indeed 

‘you know you lot really have to stop doing this to me if you want any kind of internal structure left by the end of the day’ hissed Red through gritted teeth the morning of the trip. We had both agreed to take no shit from the family. The family had other ideas 

‘So Val and Peter are going to be your tour guides and..’ 

‘WHAT’ we yelled, pulling out various daggers and whatnot. Val gave a mischievous cackle. Red pinned her against the wall in glow, holding a knife to her throat and muttered in Norse 

‘Ek love þú brunhilð valkyrie en ek swear til odin eðsár er hellinn er upp þar at ef þú embarrass mik, love munu munu lastinn hugsumk á minn minð. murder munu probably munu einn ór fyrstrinn’ 

(I love you Brunhilde Valkyrie but I swear to Odin or whoever the hell is up there that if you embarrass me love will be the last thing on my mind. and murder will probably be the first) 

Then let her go so she crashed to the floor, sniggering, and stormed off to get dressed. I proposed a similar threat to Peter, and followed her, ignoring the raucous sniggering coming from the kitchen. 

Red and I walked to school that day, not trusting anyone to take us there, and went straight to the gym where we had beeen told to meet. We met Nick and Al, swore on our own graves that they were not allowed to join in with whatever the damn avengers were planning, and sat down for role call. 

‘ok...ooookkkkk we can do this’ I muttered, taking a deep breath as the door opened. 

‘no we can’t I'm running away’. Red grabbed me by the shoulder and double tapped her wrist. 

‘fine but you can’t call semi-colon again for...the whole day’ I sighed. she raised an eyebrow and dragged me up to the front 

Val started shouting out across the crowd 

‘if you lot don’t shut up you won’t meet Iron man....’ silence fell 

‘wow that really worked. het girls are so weird’ she muttered 

‘I wouldn’t know’ replied Red and I. 

‘so you’re all going to get basic level entry cards – you've all been here before I think so I'm not going to bother explaining all that shit again, the cards will become useless on exit et cetera, so we’re going to hand out time tables I think?’ she paused briefly as the time tables were handed out 

‘how am I doing? Embarrassing you yet.’ muttered Val and Red hissed back 

‘perfect as ever cariad but you don’t fool me’. 

‘ok I'll see if I can embarrass you now’ muttered Val, and leant down to kiss Red. Who turned the colour of her name and flicked Val in the face 

‘none of that thank you very much’ she said primly 

‘mission accomplished’ whispered Val and high fived Peter. I grabbed him by the ear, dragged him down and hissed in his ear 

‘i am stressed, angry and I have Belova blood and Romanoff training do not mess with me’ he nodded terrified and shuffled to the other side of the group. I high fived Red. 

‘right if you’ll follow me..’ called Val, and they opened the door and shepherded the flock inside 

‘hey friday access please’ called out Val confidently 

‘hello crazy gay norse vodka aunt, also future king of somewhere far far away’ said FRIDAY 

‘access approved’ 

‘he he we have tricks too’ muttered Red, smugness plastering her face. 

‘FRIDAY’ said Val patronizingly 

‘Please change my name back’ 

‘i’m sorry crazy gay norse vodka aunt, also future king of somehwere far far away but the name crazy gay vodka aunt also future king of somewhere far far away is now implemented in the system, you will have to wait for the system reboot in two week to reset. ‘ 

Val pinched the bridge of her nose and held up her hands in surrender 

‘fine you win that round’. She marched through the scanner, her armour getting caught and tripping. She stood uo, brushed herself down, muttered 

‘all about the recovery’ 

And turned to the group, smiling like a shark in a fish tank. 

‘so if everyone will just put their cards on the scanner as they come in, we can get started.’ 

Red, Alex, Nick and me hung back as our names were already in the system and waited for the others to noddle through. 

Finally it was our turn 

‘Hey FRIDAY’ called Al 

‘Hello miss majors aka Shuri 2.0, access approved’ Al rolled her eyes and walked through the scanner 

‘believe me when shuri’s involved it can get a lot more personal than that’ I called after her, and threw nick at the scanner 

‘hi FRIDAY’ he said nervously 

‘Hello mister majors aka potternerd’ said FRIDAY, almost smugly..if an AI can be smug...and Nick sighed and walked through 

‘ladies first’ I sniggered, psuhing red towards the scanner. 

‘never have I hated you more for being genderfluid. It is the smuggest gender identity in the world.’ hissed red 

I curtseyed, and threw her into the scanner 

‘fine. FRIDAY do your worst’ groaned Red, and the smug voice came out of thin air 

‘hello Miss Dawn, aka the future queen of asgard’ 

‘urfgfhnnhnn FRIDAY CHANGE THAT NOW’ muttered Red. 

Val pulled a sad face 

‘you refusing to be my queen?’ she whined, and Red grabbed her by the braids, twisting them so she yelped and whispered angrily into her ear 

‘Ek hafalreadyr munið outeð með komputerr til minn entire klass ek munu eigi munu proposeð til inn fyrir ór þau sem vel. ok ek em eigi þinn dróttning ek em minn own dróttning svá shut þinn stupið beautiful andlit ok let mik fá á með þessi tour. Ek munu break þú inn matchesrinn’ 

(I hafalreadyies been outed along computeries to mine entire class I be not be proposed to in ahead of them as well. and also I am not your queen I am mine own queen so shught your stupid beautiful face and also leght me affect at along these touies. I be break you in matchesrinn) - norse doesn’t exactly translate to English well but I got the gist. 

Red let go of her supposed future wife’s hair and flounced through my scanner. Oh dear god. My turn now. I sighed and gestured to FRIDAY 

‘hello miss slash mister..’ 

‘Mister today FRI’ I muttered 

‘my mistake – greetings mister Belova aka надоедливый тот, кто лучше всех в обоих полов’ said FRIDAY. 

My face went scarlet, and I hurried through the scanner. Red was laughing her head off. 

‘oh the best of both are you’ she said, faking offence and ruffling my hair 

‘c’mon Val museum this way’ I choked and hurried forward 

‘Hey what did it say?’ asked someone. 

I whipped around and held a threatening finger up to Red’s face 

‘it said aka better than all the others in both genders’ called Val with a snigger. 

I shook my head slowly at her, pure hatred on my face and spoke without looking away. 

‘Red you’d better crush your future wife later or I just might succumb to the temptation’ I muttered angrily 

‘right we’ve hung around the scanners and done threats for too long now, it’s getting boring come on’ called Peter and we grudgingly followed him. 

‘i know it was you peter’ I muttered over comms as everyone exclaimed over the artefacts in the museum 

Yeah fine it was me but Shuri said she’d put something in if I didn’t so be grateful you weren’t something awful – she made it so they literally can’t be changed till the system reboot’ 

‘fine thanks I guess’ 

‘you’re welcome’ 

At that point Tony came down and everyone crowded around him taking selfies and begging for a speech. He started explaining the suits and the setup of the avengers and all the kind of boring history that nobody is really interested in. He was just starting on the finer points when I lost the will to live, I paged Pepper 

911 PLEASE HELP US STARK IS DOING A SPEECH 

A few minutes later pepper’s voice came on over the tannoy 

‘Hey Tony did you reschedule that meeting with the head of..whatever that boring company was..that was meant to be today because it’s still in your calender as starting twenty minutes ago...’ 

‘OH CRAPPITY SHIT BALLS’ screamed Tony, sprinting out the doors. 

‘language’ we all called after him, and Val checked her watch, chokig out words over the laughter 

‘okay....guys we are … a bit …. behind schedule...so’ she breathed deeply 

‘if you’ll follow spider boi, we can head up to the labs and meet Dr Banner, and Shuri and the interns 

We all traipsed up after Peter, and as we entered the corridor with Bruce’s lab we heard a kerfuffle taking place 

‘I HAVE SEVEN PHD’S THAT’S RIGHT SEVEN! HOW MANY DOES THE HULK HAVE HMM? HOW MANY? ZERO? THAT’S RIGHT ZERO’ 

We opened the door, rather cautiously, and Red stuck her head inside 

‘everything ok Bruce?’ she asked carefully 

‘oh right hi future asgard queen yeah everything’s fine I was just....teaching’. Red’s shoulders sagged in frustration and I could imagine the dirty look on her face. She pulled open the lab door and ushered everyone in. 

Any questions for Dr Banner?’ asked Peter. 

A volley of hands shot up 

‘About science’ 

A volley of hands shot down. 

Our time in Bruce’s lab was short lived. After a few feeble questions we backed out and headed for Shuri’s. 

‘hey Shuri can we come in?’ Peter called through the crack 

‘There’s some pretty evil smelling gas wafting through the door...’ 

‘oh yeah don’t worry about that it’s not toxic my dumb intern just accidentally exploded some m&ms with..well I have no clue what the romanova-hill it was but it let out some pretty intense gas.’ she called back and with a look of trepidation we entered the lab to see Shuri grinning with a peg over her nose 

‘Hi everyone, I'm shuri, ah I see you are accompanied by the future..’ 

‘i swear to God Shuri princess or not if you call me the future queen of asguard one more time I will break all the bones in your body whilst naming them because I have to learn them for a biology exam’ said Red threateningly. 

Shuri sniggered. 

‘i see others have already got there – sorry king’s orders we have to call you that’. 

Before Red could answer or murder Val or both Shuri carried on 

‘Hi everyone, I'm Princess Shuri of Wakanda except I no longer live in Wakanda I live in this lovely craphole with my wife and about a thousand glowing people to throw memes at. If any of you are smart enough to get an internship here you’ll probably be taught by me – lucky me – but I warn you I have incredibly high standards and so fair Al is the only one I can put up with God I've missed you Al.’ 

From there Shuri gave a bit of a lecture about the kind of work done in the labs at Starks, punctuated with many vines I did not understand but which made Val rupture several minor organs laughing and concluded with a couple of demonstrations, including her suit that allowed her to walk, she explained that with a few adjustments, and a little debulking she would be able to wear it permanently and walk again. Everyone clapped and we headed off to the intern lab, where Al held a competition to make the coolest reaction possible (mainly for our entertainment as we all knew what would happen with some of the concoctions they were making) 

After a few explosions and much foul gas, the boy who had recognised me on my first day and the girl who had noticed the blood all over me when I got back from the primark escapade won and got the prize of....well a compliment from Shuri which is a rare and beautiful thing. 

Next, we went to the cafteteria and shovelled down great piles of lasagne, repressing the urge to murder Val with it and making evil plans to conquer our damn tour guides in the exhibition matches. Given that they were coming up next, Red and I left early to get changed. 

After lunch, Val and Peter, now in full spidersuit, led the group up to the training floors and Carol waved us all in 

‘hi everyone, today we’re going to go through some basic martial arts and ground fighting moves, then we’re going to have some student matches to see what you can do, then the avengers will have their chance to show off however they like – we aren’t going to sort it by gender because I can see just by looking at you that that’s not the perfect indictaor of strength in this group ummm – ok if I call you one go to Black Widow, if I call you two go with Valkyrie – Val be kind – and If I call you three go with me and just have fun! God that sounds cheesy but please do!’ 

They sorted our years into groups, Red and I were in one, along with some gym freaks, most people were in two, and the boy who had taken a rest climbing the stairs was in three along with a couple of anorexically skinny girls and a few other weeds. 

Nat used Red and I as examples, shouting out in japanese as we threw eachother around with tremendous force 

‘now kids I would recommend that you didn’t throw eachother quite as hard as these do because they’ve been taught a lot of boring safety to stop themselves getting a broken neck and we don’t have time for that today, just as we don’t have time to treat any intracerebral hemorrages. Now go again baby glowsticks.’ 

After several minutes of practice and a couple of dislocated fingers, mended non-fussily and fairly painfully by nat, All the groups were ready. 

They were going to pick the best two from each group to fight eachother, then we would all laugh at them and the glowstick gals could show off. 

‘right first up is Ms Romanoff-Hill's group’ called Carol. Nat pointed at two of them, 

‘don’t embarrass me’ and gestured them onto the mat 

It was safe to say they didn’t embarrass her; annoyingly they exhibited perfect examples of her teaching and we all clapped, impressed, albeit slightly bored at their performance. THe other two groups were much more promising and had far more comdeic value; including hair pulling, literally tripping over eachother and one girl that obviously tried to impress us by doing a 360 leap kick but slipped and skidded on her bum to the edge of the mat, colliding with the wall. 

Next up they called up me Val, Red, Peter, Shuri and MJ – apparently today was the teen avengers chance to show off. First up where Shuri, wearing her awesome suit, and Em, who pulled of various displays of weaponwry-making, force wielding and brute strength, earning a decent clap at the end. 

Red cackled quietly as she and Val took their places next; Val pulled out the dragon fang and Red pointed lazily at her, barricading her way with a dawn shield as Val swiped and fought at it. Red stood lazily staring out of the window, giving Val the finger and after about ten minutes when the laughter had reached a creschendo she let it down and a dishevelled and angry asguardian came charging at her. She reached out and grabbed Val’s jaw, pushing backwards and causing her to fall with a crash on the floor. 

‘i told you not to mess with me cariad’ she said smugly, and flounced away, high fiving me as I took the mat and beckoned Peter patronizingly forward. HE came grudgingly. Immediately I surrounded him in glow as he fought it, levitated him into the air in a giant bubble and bounced him off various walls and ceilings. after I had finished crashing him around I sat down on the mat and pulled out my book, yawning theatrically and raising an eyebrow at my struggling boyfriend. 

‘shall we let him down’ I muttered over comms 

‘milk it for a few seconds then drop him’ came Red’s laugh. I sighed, then flicked my hand like a conductor and Peter came crashing down behind me. I reached a hand behind my head and grabbed him, holding him uo over my head as he swiped and shot webs. I put him down soon enough, and walked away. 

‘лучше во всех смыслах - ты сказал это первым - я просто повторяю это’ 

(better in every way – you said it first - I'm just repeating it) I called over my shoulder as I walked away, and Red and I did our complex handshake (coined that morning purely to look cool when we ground up our SOs) 

The disheveled Val straightened her squiffy bun and closed her eyes, her armour turning smoothly into sweatpants and a crop top, and Red vanished it into her dawn diary 

‘she wont be getting that back anytime soon’ she muttered, as Val called for the group to follow her upstairs. 

‘oh I think they’ve learnt their lesson now’ I whispered, gesturing at Peter, who was nursing his bruises looking like a wounded puppy, and Red let out a laugh, linking her arm in mine and dragging me after the group. 

Half of the glowstick group were already upstairs for the Q&A by the time we arrived, and we collapsed onto the sofas set out for us. I lay upside-down on the sofa, my legs over the back and my head resting on my hands crossed behind it, Peter lay in a web hammock, Val perched on the back of the sofa and Red sat twisted like a noodle over one arm. Em sat laughing on the floor, leaning back against the sofa and Shuri stood, sighing in disapproval behind the group. 

The oldies (ie adult) avengers were sitting boringly and normally on a couple of other sofas, and Tony explained 

‘so any questions or anything you have, or requests or whatever are completely open now if you want to ask us...um yeah you 

‘Why do they keep calling ...thingy ...the future queen of asguard - I mean like thors the king right and no offence but hes way too old for her’. Piped up one girl from my class.i restrained myself from rolling my eyes and laughed at Thors mock offended look, Val explained 

‘well basically I'm next in line to be king of asguard and Thor is...keeping the throne warm for me until I'm old enough’ (cue the offended look) 

‘and Red’s my grilfriend but she has...lets say commitment issues so I told this lot to call her my future wife or queen or et cetera so that it would embarrass her I mean after all that’s basically my prerogative.’ she clapped an arm around red who rolled her eyes 

‘ I do not have commitment issues brunhilde flipping..’ 

‘yeah okay next question; interjected Tony. Red sat disgruntled next to val, who patted her on the head and turned back to the group 

‘is ...Spiderman...actually sticky or is it the suit?’ 

Peter answered ‘ well it’s kind of complicated but I have a subconscious ability to manipulate electrons to create a supercharged equivalent of static cling and that lets me do my homework on the ceiling and stuff – it's quite fun – one time Val came down for a drink in the middle of the night so I covered myself in webs like a mummy and hung myself from the ceiling and grabbed her as she came in – she screamed so loud-OUCH'. 

‘sorry I misremembered she was very brave’ said Peter emphatically, ducking out of Vals way as she swiped at him again, the group laughed. 

‘hey you remember that time we wanted to know if he was life those little yellow things you throw at the window that stick so we threw him at the window while he was asleep but he just smashed through the window screaming and Red had to go get him so he didn’t die’ sniggered Shuri, and Peter shook his head 

‘no wait, that was terrifying I mean one second I was asleep then I was flying through glass and falling to my death then when I got back you were all laughig’ he said angrily. 

‘anyway moving on’ said Carol restrainedly, clearly attempting not to laugh too. 

‘So when the adult avengers can’t be avengers anymore like if you died, who would take over as your replacement – like would your kids do it or what?’ 

Nat answered this one 

‘Well that depends – with avengers like me and Clint, yeah sure our kids – biological or otherwise could take over if they wanted to, as long as they had the skills and stuff, because neither of us have any particularly supernatural powers...just supremem awesomeness and the ability to kill people with pretty much anythign we can find – a phone case for example – but we wouldn’t force it on them – it's a massive life-change – it's been great for us but it just doesn’t suit some people’ Clint nodded 

‘yeah, nothing to add - that’s pretty much what I would’ve said...apart from the bragging...’ Nat clobbered him over the back of the head and the questions continued 

‘So do any of the Avengers have like hidden talents or anything’ 

‘urrrmmmm’ em said, looking up at the ceiling in thinking mode 

‘well Val’s a great singer 

Nat makes a mean spag bol and she’s an amazing dancer 

Bruce and Tony cook really well 

Carol...is pretty much talented at everything and that’s not a secret 

The idiot over there that I married is surprisingly good at writing – like stories and stuff 

Urmmm who else 

Thor can name every single episode of friends...probably not really a talent though 

And red can do basically every surgery in the books and recite the history of the british civil war in french and they make her do it when shes 

Losing consciousness to keep her awake 

Ummm 

Peter has memorised the periodic table to insults us in periodic table 

Henri is an amazing baker and also is like elite fencer... 

Yelena is very.....creative in her well lets say scientific experiments – she tased a watermelon a couple of months ago and the results were everything you would want it to be’. She laughed 

‘and Em can change her hair colour – Red can too … she’s also amazing at drawing’ called out Peter. 

After we had finished demonstrating these skills – or most of us had – unfortunately Tony flat out banned fencing in the sitting room so I was stuck. 

‘Any last questions’ called out Carol, checking their watch 

‘last one...um...yeah you?’ 

‘So what are Henri’s like powers and name and stuff’ called out izzie from Red’s year. I fully expected mockery but answered 

‘umm well I have enhanced strength – that's probably how I held peter up with one hand in the match – don't expect I could have done that before..um I can glow, and fly – and make other things do it too - I can also burn or melt things with my hands when I want to so the others now call me captain microwave the second because I've taken over being the living microwave from Carol....umm lemme think anything else..well I don’t have any other powers as such but I have kinda features and like medical things that are kinda wacky; I don’t feel pain – it's called congenital analgesia and I got that in the red room..i also have steel bones instead of organic ones, again courtesy of the red room..urm I have alexandiria’s genesis which is pretty cool - I was born with it – it means I have purple eyes amongst other things so that’s quite fun...there might be other things but we haven’t discovered them yet, and oh yeah – my name’s black Wolf but I don’t really use it.’ I finished, leaving her looking shellshocked 

‘wait so what was the red room and also why is that your name – like all the others have reasons for their names’ 

I looked at Carol 

‘do I have time?’ 

‘yeah but no more’ I nodded and turned back 

Basically long story short, a ..kind of assasin traning camp thing called the Red room had something called the Black widow programme and of course black widow is a spider, and it was destroyed, but Em and I were kidnapped by them because they had another Red Room that we didn’t know about – it's all destroyed now and nothing to worry about – anyway it was all in Russia so you’re all safe – so basically this place kidnapped me and Em and decided to do their experiments on me, I was a prototype and I was rescued before they had finished, but basically they were trying to create a weapon – like an ultimate battle fighting thing – so hence the strength and the genetic pain manipulation, but also before Shuri made me this nifty bit of tech,’ 

I pulled up my dleeve for them to see the outline of the device beneath my skin 

‘whenever I felt any kind of strong emotion, good or bad, I would lose sense of myself and the glow would come all round me and my hands would burn etc – basically I would turn into something else, but, the tech lets me keep my sense of self and control the glow, but it also lets me control the burning because that’s not always something you want around’ I laughed 

Shuri added 

‘also as Henri’s cells learn, with the help of the device, how to suppress the enzhyme that’s released, they will learn to do it on their own and when the tech’s no longer needed it’ll dissolve – like when you get stitches – so eventually he won’t be reliant on it, his body will learn to do it by himself’. 

I pulled a sarcastic smile and thumbs up, and Carol said 

‘great! Hope you enjoyed today, if you have any other questions or want to apply for an internship, then feel free to ask Henri or Iris and they’ll put you in touch with us – again, any friends are welcome to visit - I think your bus is waiting outside so we’ll escort you back.


	5. Chapter 5

I flopped back on the sofa 

‘i think I'm going to need to sleep for a week to recover from that’ I groaned, a pillow over my face 

‘sounds like we did our job spidey’ laughed Val. 

‘uuuuffffggrrrnrnnnnnnhnhhhhhrrrrrrffff’ I groaned 

‘yep I think we did’ came Peter’s muffled voice


End file.
